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Cotton candy. Like eating a cloud of diabetes.

Dana Gould

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Dana Gould
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: August 24
Actor
Comedian
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Hopedale
Massachusetts
Dana John Gould
Dana J. Gould
Eating
Like
Diabetes
Cotton
Cloud
Candy
Clouds

More quotes by Dana Gould

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I don't really like myself, but I'm way into me, physically.
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Cowboy boots with a suit? You're a rough, tough businessman. Chaps with a bow tie? You're in the rough, tough man business.
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I love my dog, but since the kids came along, the petting has gone out of our relationship.
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What if you went to Hell, and it was exactly what you thought it would be: just a cave with fire? And the devil really was this idiot in a red leotard with a pitchfork?
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To me 30 isn't old. But it's definitely the beginning of no longer young. Because you notice little subtle things happen to you. You'll be in your car driving around listening to the radio and hear stuff like, That's was an oldie from The Clash.
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Republicans don't believe government works, and get into it to prove it will fail. Same with strippers and relationships.
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As hard as I try to live with some degree of faith in my life, I just can't believe that the full moon can turn dude into a wolf.
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Approached literally, there's but a hair's difference between You'd better not pout, you'd better not cry, and Don't scream.
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Now that the Sanctity and Holiness of heterosexual marriage has been destroyed, are they going to cancel The Bachelor?
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This is just a hunch, but I bet airplanes think helicopters are assholes.
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If you want to see what I'll look like as an old guy, check out any recent photo of me.
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My daughter will say she's hungry, and I'm like, 'Buddy, you're just bored. Do you understand? And you're already starting a pattern of satisfying an internal disconnect with an external stimulation, and that's a dead-end road, sweetie. Courtney Love lives on that road you don't want to live on that road.
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Just saw a woman with a big tattoo of Jesus on her back. I guess it's an ixnay on the oggy style-day.
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I take the Bible literally, but not seriously.
Dana Gould
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What's a farmer's market without some guy singing Here Comes The Sun in a way that makes you wish the sun would stop coming up.
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People get into stand-up comedy by and large because they're smart and they have a perspective.
Dana Gould
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Whoever thought to name a candy bar Butterfinger has either never seen Last Tango In Paris or seen it far too many times.
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There is no fast, easy shortcut for the word abbreviation.
Dana Gould
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Drum Competitions are called such because no one wants to win the big Beat Off.
Dana Gould
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Love means never having to say you're sorry. Marriage means apologizing when you know you're right.
Dana Gould