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Take away the robots and the special effects, and Star Wars is just the simple story of a group of friends planning a terrorist attack.

Dana Gould

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Dana Gould
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: August 24
Actor
Comedian
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Hopedale
Massachusetts
Dana John Gould
Dana J. Gould
Stories
Groups
Robots
Take
Special
Wars
Stars
Attack
Friends
Terrorist
Story
Planning
Simple
Star
War
Group
Away
Effects

More quotes by Dana Gould

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You rarely get a convincing lecture on playing to your strength from a bald guy with a ponytail.
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My daughter will say she's hungry, and I'm like, 'Buddy, you're just bored. Do you understand? And you're already starting a pattern of satisfying an internal disconnect with an external stimulation, and that's a dead-end road, sweetie. Courtney Love lives on that road you don't want to live on that road.
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If The Beatles represent the most successful version you can be of a thing, then by that definition The Rolling Stones are The Beatles of music, not counting The Beatles. John Lennon is The Beatles of The Beatles.
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I have no ability to develop muscle tone. I could do situps all day and still look like a condom full of walnuts.
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The hard part about living in the present is it forces you to abandon hope for the future. Thanks for nothing, now.
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You have an obligation to challenge your fans and your viewers.
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I got mugged about six months ago. The oddest thing about the entire situation, though, was that I wasn't afraid, which is strange because basically I experience my life through two primary emotions: fear and suppressed fear.
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As Global Warming raises temparatures, it takes longer to cool pies on window sills, and I wonder if this whole thing was caused by hobos.
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I love it when dogs yawn. Especially when it's in the middle of another dog's speech.
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The more women walk around in sweat pants, the harder it is to tell who's out jogging and who's running away from a mugger.
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The magazine at the health food store said, Stop Aging! Isn't that what death is for? Trust me, we're all gonna stop aging.
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What if you went to Hell, and it was exactly what you thought it would be: just a cave with fire? And the devil really was this idiot in a red leotard with a pitchfork?
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My life is just like Breaking Bad except instead of a chemistry teacher I'm just a guy and instead of making meth I don't do much.
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Egg nog. Because nothing satisfies like a cold glass of eggs.
Dana Gould
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Whenever someone starts a statement with, Let me tell you the kind of guy I am, that is a great time to start sawing your own head off.
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New synonyms for sex: Going to a family function, getting the hard part over with, anti-fillet. Get it? Sex!
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Since the dawn of time, primitive humans thought, loved and had poetry. They also pooped on everything. It was horrible.
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If you read angry political blogs, substitute Obama with my daddy and you'll usually learn a lot about the author.
Dana Gould
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Always remember, you don't stop shitting your pants because you grow old. You grow old because you stop shitting your pants.
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Life imitates art but art intimidates life.
Dana Gould