Quote

The only thing that will stop a bad guy with a pressure cooker bomb is a good guy with a slightly larger pressure cooker bomb.

Dana Gould

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Dana Gould
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: August 24
Actor
Comedian
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Hopedale
Massachusetts
Dana John Gould
Dana J. Gould
Pressure
Stop
Guy
Cooker
Thing
Cookers
Good
Bomb
Slightly
Bombs
Larger

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Whoever thought to name a candy bar Butterfinger has either never seen Last Tango In Paris or seen it far too many times.
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I don't want to appear to be placing blame, but as far my life is concerned, everything is pretty much my dad's ball's fault.
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Where is the good will in the thought, I was going to throw this in the garbage, do you want to wear it?
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I try to live in the moment, but by the time I get there it's too late.
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Classified ads of the Ku Klux Klan: Tired of all the games? Do you like racial purity, horses and dressing up like a ghost?
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Unshaven dudes in hoodies and ski caps look so hip and cool, until they too close to a grocery cart full of dented cans.
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For men there are costumes like fireman, policeman and vampire. For women there are costumes like slutty fireman, slutty policeman and slutty vampire.
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Wrote a science fiction novel about a man who wins an argument with his wife, but it was rejected for being too farfetched.
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If I ever go into a coma, one of you has to promise to come by occasionally and tweeze my unibrow.
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It might not be rational, but I am terrified of getting stuck in an elevator with a bear.
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I like to think of Doritos as emotional packing material to safeguard the feelings I've swallowed.
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My daughter will say she's hungry, and I'm like, 'Buddy, you're just bored. Do you understand? And you're already starting a pattern of satisfying an internal disconnect with an external stimulation, and that's a dead-end road, sweetie. Courtney Love lives on that road you don't want to live on that road.
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Do you know what Irish Alzheimer's is? It's when you forget everything but your grudges.
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They say that God is in the details. Then again, they also say that the Devil is in the details. Boy, talk about awkward.
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If you're selling something on Craiglist, it's never a good idea to end the description with, May have lice.
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Anything is possible if you believe in yourself, said the guidance counsellor, stifling a laugh.
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Dogs - putting the lie to the age-old saying, I could never love anyone who ate a diaper.
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One day they will invent a time machine and, like the internet, it will be used primarily for boning.
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My fantasy football team got mixed up in another fantasy and now they're stuck on a pirate ship with a chick in a Catwoman suit.
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I think I had an argument with a hypnotist this morning. It makes perfect sense as I have no memory of it.
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