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If God is all powerful, and Jesus is the son of God, why did He make His birthday fall on Christmas?

Dana Gould

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Dana Gould
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: August 24
Actor
Comedian
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Hopedale
Massachusetts
Dana John Gould
Dana J. Gould
Jesus
Fall
Make
Birthday
Christmas
Son
Powerful

More quotes by Dana Gould

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One great way to mess with devout Christians and atheists would be if Jesus came back and said, By the way, you know I'm fake, right?
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I was watching Batman, the TV show, on TV Land, on the cable. And Robin said to Batman, Golly, Batman! Why is the Joker so evil!? And Batman said, Careful, Robin. The criminal mind sees the world through a prism the solid citizen dare not peer through. Batman has a more nuanced worldview than the president.
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The man who invented instant pudding was moved to action by an inability to wait for pudding.
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Why do I always meet women as I'm leaving the dog park with a big bag of poop? And it's always on the day I forgot my dog.
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If you encounter someone who pronounces the t in often, odds are they're a douchebag.
Dana Gould
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I love it when dogs yawn. Especially when it's in the middle of another dog's speech.
Dana Gould
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Dogs - putting the lie to the age-old saying, I could never love anyone who ate a diaper.
Dana Gould
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People get into stand-up comedy by and large because they're smart and they have a perspective.
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Love is like pancreatitis it starts off slow, then builds in intensity until you become consumed and develop violent cramps.
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Life is like The Muppet Show, but instead of Muppets there's anxiety.
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Cotton candy. Like eating a cloud of diabetes.
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Republicans don't believe government works, and get into it to prove it will fail. Same with strippers and relationships.
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I love my dog, but since the kids came along, the petting has gone out of our relationship.
Dana Gould
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I'm a workaholic, only instead of working I like to drink liquor.
Dana Gould
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I like to think of Doritos as emotional packing material to safeguard the feelings I've swallowed.
Dana Gould
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My father hauled boxes so I could get an education and earn enough money to pay someone to make me lift weights.
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I think I had an argument with a hypnotist this morning. It makes perfect sense as I have no memory of it.
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Cupcakes - when you want to watch your weight, but still feel the pride that comes with eating an entire cake.
Dana Gould
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For men there are costumes like fireman, policeman and vampire. For women there are costumes like slutty fireman, slutty policeman and slutty vampire.
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Want to be happy? Don't live competitively. Be content who you are. Live at peace with yourself and the losers below you.
Dana Gould