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I'm going to live until I die, and everything in between is just another excuse to eat peanut butter.

Dana Gould

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Dana Gould
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: August 24
Actor
Comedian
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Hopedale
Massachusetts
Dana John Gould
Dana J. Gould
Excuse
Dies
Another
Live
Everything
Going
Peanut
Peanuts
Butter

More quotes by Dana Gould

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Christ was born in a manger, laying down amongst donkeys ang goats. He was given gifts of incense and perfume. No kidding.
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I'm a workaholic, only instead of working I like to drink liquor.
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The hard part about living in the present is it forces you to abandon hope for the future. Thanks for nothing, now.
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Maybe the next three Star Wars movies will tell the story of how the last three Star Wars movies got so shitty.
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Just because one pedophile is a football coach, please don't turn against all pedophiles.
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To really make it look like Santa came, I put reindeer poop on the roof. It's just so cold up there with my pants down.
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What if you died, and you found out that when you died, we all went to the same place. No Heaven, no Hell, doesn't matter what you did in life - you all go to the same place, regardless. I know a lot of nice people who will be really pissed off. You'll see Gandhi arguing with the doorman.
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If I had a dreamcatcher when I was thirteen, it would have spent many long days in the dryer.
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This is just a hunch, but I bet airplanes think helicopters are assholes.
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Centuries ago, human beings created marriage. Later, they looked to the sky and dreamt of traveling to the moon. Coincidence?
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You rarely get a convincing lecture on playing to your strength from a bald guy with a ponytail.
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Competition is the death of art.
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One great way to mess with devout Christians and atheists would be if Jesus came back and said, By the way, you know I'm fake, right?
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Do you know what Irish Alzheimer's is? It's when you forget everything but your grudges.
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If there's one thing worse than being really angry for no reason, it's suddenly remembering the reason.
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A great way to be left alone on the subway is to appear to be deep in conversation with a small knife.
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Love is like pancreatitis it starts off slow, then builds in intensity until you become consumed and develop violent cramps.
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I'm no longer afraid of not making enough mistakes.
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Very few positive experiences begin with being told to count back slowly from ten.
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My fantasy football team got mixed up in another fantasy and now they're stuck on a pirate ship with a chick in a Catwoman suit.
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