Quote

I love it when dogs yawn. Especially when it's in the middle of another dog's speech.

Dana Gould

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Dana Gould
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: August 24
Actor
Comedian
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Hopedale
Massachusetts
Dana John Gould
Dana J. Gould
Especially
Middle
Another
Love
Yawn
Dogs
Dog
Speech

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Women are like pumpkins you search and search for the perfect one, bring it home, and the next thing you know, you're looking for a knife.
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Love is like pancreatitis it starts off slow, then builds in intensity until you become consumed and develop violent cramps.
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The hard part about living in the present is it forces you to abandon hope for the future. Thanks for nothing, now.
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The weird thing about old Playboys is knowing that the naked woman is now an old lady. I said weird. I didn't say bad.
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Here's something you never hear: Now that I've worked through all my emotional issues, I'm free to dedicate my life to ventriloquism!
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Every Thanksgiving we feed the homeless so they may join us as we celebrate other people finding a home.
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If I had a dreamcatcher when I was thirteen, it would have spent many long days in the dryer.
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Life is like The Muppet Show, but instead of Muppets there's anxiety.
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If I ever go into a coma, one of you has to promise to come by occasionally and tweeze my unibrow.
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Do people in the Ku Klux Klan who die and come back as ghosts have to wear two sheets when attending the rally?
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Every day is a gift. That said, I've gotten some pretty shitty gifts over the years.
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As Global Warming raises temparatures, it takes longer to cool pies on window sills, and I wonder if this whole thing was caused by hobos.
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I'm no longer afraid of not making enough mistakes.
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Where is the good will in the thought, I was going to throw this in the garbage, do you want to wear it?
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Take away the robots and the special effects, and Star Wars is just the simple story of a group of friends planning a terrorist attack.
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Our dog just wanders around the house with a concerned look on his face. Dogs are just people who can't find their phone.
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I think I had an argument with a hypnotist this morning. It makes perfect sense as I have no memory of it.
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Dogs - putting the lie to the age-old saying, I could never love anyone who ate a diaper.
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There's nothing like a string of Xmas lights inside the house to make the whole family feel like they live in a vintage clothing store.
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Strap On spelled backwards is No Parts. Just sayin'.
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