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If you want to see what I'll look like as an old guy, check out any recent photo of me.

Dana Gould

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Dana Gould
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: August 24
Actor
Comedian
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Hopedale
Massachusetts
Dana John Gould
Dana J. Gould
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More quotes by Dana Gould

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Cowboy boots with a suit? You're a rough, tough businessman. Chaps with a bow tie? You're in the rough, tough man business.
Dana Gould
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What if you died, and you found out that when you died, we all went to the same place. No Heaven, no Hell, doesn't matter what you did in life - you all go to the same place, regardless. I know a lot of nice people who will be really pissed off. You'll see Gandhi arguing with the doorman.
Dana Gould
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I love it when dogs yawn. Especially when it's in the middle of another dog's speech.
Dana Gould
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It might not be rational, but I am terrified of getting stuck in an elevator with a bear.
Dana Gould
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Our dog just wanders around the house with a concerned look on his face. Dogs are just people who can't find their phone.
Dana Gould
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The magazine at the health food store said, Stop Aging! Isn't that what death is for? Trust me, we're all gonna stop aging.
Dana Gould
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I was watching Batman, the TV show, on TV Land, on the cable. And Robin said to Batman, Golly, Batman! Why is the Joker so evil!? And Batman said, Careful, Robin. The criminal mind sees the world through a prism the solid citizen dare not peer through. Batman has a more nuanced worldview than the president.
Dana Gould
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Do people in the Ku Klux Klan who die and come back as ghosts have to wear two sheets when attending the rally?
Dana Gould
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You rarely get a convincing lecture on playing to your strength from a bald guy with a ponytail.
Dana Gould
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I know that big, important things don't just come together overnight, but I've been me for a long time now and it's still not working.
Dana Gould
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Competition is the death of art.
Dana Gould
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What's a farmer's market without some guy singing Here Comes The Sun in a way that makes you wish the sun would stop coming up.
Dana Gould
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Cotton candy. Like eating a cloud of diabetes.
Dana Gould
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Every Thanksgiving we feed the homeless so they may join us as we celebrate other people finding a home.
Dana Gould
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I think I had an argument with a hypnotist this morning. It makes perfect sense as I have no memory of it.
Dana Gould
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I'm no longer afraid of not making enough mistakes.
Dana Gould
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Is there an award for the best trophy? I bet they hand out a plaque.
Dana Gould
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Strap On spelled backwards is No Parts. Just sayin'.
Dana Gould
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One great way to mess with devout Christians and atheists would be if Jesus came back and said, By the way, you know I'm fake, right?
Dana Gould
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That which does not kill you isn't finished.
Dana Gould