Quote

Showing joy by jumping up and down and clapping goes away at some point between pre-school and being old enough to go to orgies.

Dana Gould

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Dana Gould
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: August 24
Actor
Comedian
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Hopedale
Massachusetts
Dana John Gould
Dana J. Gould
Jumping
Showing
Joy
Goes
Point
Away
School
Orgies
Enough
Clapping

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The Elephant Man claimed his head was big because, it's so full of dreams. Actually, it's because his skull was shaped like a turkey.
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Now that the Sanctity and Holiness of heterosexual marriage has been destroyed, are they going to cancel The Bachelor?
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There is no fast, easy shortcut for the word abbreviation.
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When I finally invent a time machine you will already know about it because I'll have told you a long time ago.
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I like to think of Doritos as emotional packing material to safeguard the feelings I've swallowed.
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The Cadillac Escalade is the perfect vehicle for a pimp with a growing family.
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Chihuahuas are the perfect pet if you don't have a person in your life who screams and shits their pants every time there's a noise.
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In the land of the blind, the one-eyed man will probably end up dating the best looking blind chick.
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I don't mind being alone when I'm surrounded by people, I just hate being alone when I'm alone.
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Something tells me that Mitt Romney's sex face is the same as his regular face.
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If there's one thing worse than being really angry for no reason, it's suddenly remembering the reason.
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If The Beatles represent the most successful version you can be of a thing, then by that definition The Rolling Stones are The Beatles of music, not counting The Beatles. John Lennon is The Beatles of The Beatles.
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Know someone you hate? Give their kid a kazoo!
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It might not be rational, but I am terrified of getting stuck in an elevator with a bear.
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I love it when dogs yawn. Especially when it's in the middle of another dog's speech.
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Centuries ago, human beings created marriage. Later, they looked to the sky and dreamt of traveling to the moon. Coincidence?
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Have you ever dated a Goth chick for four or five months until you realized she was just an Orthodox Jew? They have the same costumes.
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I was watching Batman, the TV show, on TV Land, on the cable. And Robin said to Batman, Golly, Batman! Why is the Joker so evil!? And Batman said, Careful, Robin. The criminal mind sees the world through a prism the solid citizen dare not peer through. Batman has a more nuanced worldview than the president.
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Want to be happy? Don't live competitively. Be content who you are. Live at peace with yourself and the losers below you.
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