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Cowboy boots with a suit? You're a rough, tough businessman. Chaps with a bow tie? You're in the rough, tough man business.

Dana Gould

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Dana Gould
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: August 24
Actor
Comedian
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Hopedale
Massachusetts
Dana John Gould
Dana J. Gould
Boots
Ties
Rough
Suits
Chaps
Tough
Cowboy
Business
Bows
Men
Businessman
Suit

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This is just a hunch, but I bet airplanes think helicopters are assholes.
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I'm no longer afraid of not making enough mistakes.
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Since the dawn of time, primitive humans thought, loved and had poetry. They also pooped on everything. It was horrible.
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The more women walk around in sweat pants, the harder it is to tell who's out jogging and who's running away from a mugger.
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Love means never having to say you're sorry. Marriage means apologizing when you know you're right.
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If God had wanted women to have giant, fake boobs he'd be a lot like my brother.
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Strap On spelled backwards is No Parts. Just sayin'.
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I have all my ex-girlfriends lumped into one big girlfriend I called M.A.N.D.Y.: My, Another Neurotic Disappointment? Yes.
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If you want to see what I'll look like as an old guy, check out any recent photo of me.
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The gun legislation was doomed the minute it became associated with the words common sense.
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Why do old people drive with their mouths open?
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If life begins at conception, but you can be born again later, only to live on eternally after death, what's the big deal about anything?
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My dog is so old, she now has a lot of cats.
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To me 30 isn't old. But it's definitely the beginning of no longer young. Because you notice little subtle things happen to you. You'll be in your car driving around listening to the radio and hear stuff like, That's was an oldie from The Clash.
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You have an obligation to challenge your fans and your viewers.
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I got mugged about six months ago. The oddest thing about the entire situation, though, was that I wasn't afraid, which is strange because basically I experience my life through two primary emotions: fear and suppressed fear.
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If there's one thing worse than being really angry for no reason, it's suddenly remembering the reason.
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I feel sorry for high school teams still named the Cougars. Now what does the coach say? Get out there and play like horny old ladies!
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Life is like The Muppet Show, but instead of Muppets there's anxiety.
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My dogs love me. Of course, by love I mean poop and by me I mean everywhere.
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