Quote

Cowboy boots with a suit? You're a rough, tough businessman. Chaps with a bow tie? You're in the rough, tough man business.

Dana Gould

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Dana Gould
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: August 24
Actor
Comedian
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Hopedale
Massachusetts
Dana John Gould
Dana J. Gould
Suits
Chaps
Tough
Cowboy
Business
Bows
Men
Businessman
Suit
Boots
Ties
Rough

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Competition is the death of art.
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The Cadillac Escalade is the perfect vehicle for a pimp with a growing family.
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There's nothing like a string of Xmas lights inside the house to make the whole family feel like they live in a vintage clothing store.
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Did you know that Dog Heaven and Cat Hell were the same place?
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What if you died, and you found out that when you died, we all went to the same place. No Heaven, no Hell, doesn't matter what you did in life - you all go to the same place, regardless. I know a lot of nice people who will be really pissed off. You'll see Gandhi arguing with the doorman.
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Life is like jury duty. Just do it and get it over with.
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Every Thanksgiving we feed the homeless so they may join us as we celebrate other people finding a home.
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For men there are costumes like fireman, policeman and vampire. For women there are costumes like slutty fireman, slutty policeman and slutty vampire.
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Showing joy by jumping up and down and clapping goes away at some point between pre-school and being old enough to go to orgies.
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If you're selling something on Craiglist, it's never a good idea to end the description with, May have lice.
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Take away the robots and the special effects, and Star Wars is just the simple story of a group of friends planning a terrorist attack.
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Why did I adopt kids? I dunno. Let me look at my family: religious weirdo, gun nut, biker, boozer, dead tooth, too many cats, the guy who talks to his truck. Hmm. Maybe I adopted because genetically my balls are full of poison.
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Why do old people drive with their mouths open?
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If life begins at conception, but you can be born again later, only to live on eternally after death, what's the big deal about anything?
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I'm no longer afraid of not making enough mistakes.
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Have you ever dated a Goth chick for four or five months until you realized she was just an Orthodox Jew? They have the same costumes.
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I went to high school with some wonderful people, but my entire high school experience was just waiting to leave.
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I don't mind being alone when I'm surrounded by people, I just hate being alone when I'm alone.
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I like to think of Doritos as emotional packing material to safeguard the feelings I've swallowed.
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I know that big, important things don't just come together overnight, but I've been me for a long time now and it's still not working.
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