Share
×
Inspirational Quotes
Authors
Professions
Topics
Tags
Quote
Classified ads of the Ku Klux Klan: Tired of all the games? Do you like racial purity, horses and dressing up like a ghost?
Dana Gould
Share
Change background
T
T
T
Change font
Original
TAGS & TOPICS
Dana Gould
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: August 24
Actor
Comedian
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Hopedale
Massachusetts
Dana John Gould
Dana J. Gould
Ghost
Klan
Advertising
Classified
Horse
Dressings
Tired
Dressing
Games
Ads
Like
Racial
Horses
Purity
Klux
More quotes by Dana Gould
There's nothing like a clown with a boner to remind you that you're having a nightmare.
Dana Gould
Did you know that Dog Heaven and Cat Hell were the same place?
Dana Gould
I try to live in the moment, but by the time I get there it's too late.
Dana Gould
If I had a dreamcatcher when I was thirteen, it would have spent many long days in the dryer.
Dana Gould
I was watching Batman, the TV show, on TV Land, on the cable. And Robin said to Batman, Golly, Batman! Why is the Joker so evil!? And Batman said, Careful, Robin. The criminal mind sees the world through a prism the solid citizen dare not peer through. Batman has a more nuanced worldview than the president.
Dana Gould
I love it when dogs yawn. Especially when it's in the middle of another dog's speech.
Dana Gould
I don't like to generalize, but if you see a guy with his shirt tucked into his shorts, he's probably killed three or four children.
Dana Gould
When I finally invent a time machine you will already know about it because I'll have told you a long time ago.
Dana Gould
The Cadillac Escalade is the perfect vehicle for a pimp with a growing family.
Dana Gould
The man who invented instant pudding was moved to action by an inability to wait for pudding.
Dana Gould
Always remember, you don't stop shitting your pants because you grow old. You grow old because you stop shitting your pants.
Dana Gould
I love my dog, but since the kids came along, the petting has gone out of our relationship.
Dana Gould
The only thing that will stop a bad guy with a pressure cooker bomb is a good guy with a slightly larger pressure cooker bomb.
Dana Gould
They say that God is in the details. Then again, they also say that the Devil is in the details. Boy, talk about awkward.
Dana Gould
I live in Los Angeles. It's a very liberal city, but it's so hypocritical in what it's liberal about. You can be driving down Hollywood Boulevard, see a guy in lipstick and high heels wearing a fur coat masturbating into a mailbox. People giving him a hard time as they drive by: Hey, is that real fur? Of course not! That's sick!
Dana Gould
New synonyms for sex: Going to a family function, getting the hard part over with, anti-fillet. Get it? Sex!
Dana Gould
If pop music reflects the culture, this will surely go down as the era in which people rose up and realized it was fun to dance at parties.
Dana Gould
To really make it look like Santa came, I put reindeer poop on the roof. It's just so cold up there with my pants down.
Dana Gould
My dog keeps looking at me as if he knows my secret, as if he and he alone can see my soul. That or he wants this pork chop.
Dana Gould
Life is like The Muppet Show, but instead of Muppets there's anxiety.
Dana Gould