Quote

Just saw a woman with a big tattoo of Jesus on her back. I guess it's an ixnay on the oggy style-day.

Dana Gould

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Dana Gould
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: August 24
Actor
Comedian
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Hopedale
Massachusetts
Dana John Gould
Dana J. Gould
Jesus
Bigs
Woman
Back
Tattoo
Guess
Saws
Style

More quotes by Dana Gould

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I want to leave the world as I entered it: naked and crying in a room full of strangers.
Dana Gould
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Competition is the death of art.
Dana Gould
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Have you ever dated a Goth chick for four or five months until you realized she was just an Orthodox Jew? They have the same costumes.
Dana Gould
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What if you died, and you found out that when you died, we all went to the same place. No Heaven, no Hell, doesn't matter what you did in life - you all go to the same place, regardless. I know a lot of nice people who will be really pissed off. You'll see Gandhi arguing with the doorman.
Dana Gould
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Classified ads of the Ku Klux Klan: Tired of all the games? Do you like racial purity, horses and dressing up like a ghost?
Dana Gould
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It's gonna be awesome! A suspected pedophile dunks my kids head in a bucket so when she dies she can live in an invisible castle. Set the alarm!
Dana Gould
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I don't like to generalize, but if you see a guy with his shirt tucked into his shorts, he's probably killed three or four children.
Dana Gould
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The magazine at the health food store said, Stop Aging! Isn't that what death is for? Trust me, we're all gonna stop aging.
Dana Gould
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A great way to be left alone on the subway is to appear to be deep in conversation with a small knife.
Dana Gould
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If pop music reflects the culture, this will surely go down as the era in which people rose up and realized it was fun to dance at parties.
Dana Gould
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I'm no longer afraid of not making enough mistakes.
Dana Gould
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I was watching Batman, the TV show, on TV Land, on the cable. And Robin said to Batman, Golly, Batman! Why is the Joker so evil!? And Batman said, Careful, Robin. The criminal mind sees the world through a prism the solid citizen dare not peer through. Batman has a more nuanced worldview than the president.
Dana Gould
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How come, when people wear half shirts, it's always the top half?
Dana Gould
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To really make it look like Santa came, I put reindeer poop on the roof. It's just so cold up there with my pants down.
Dana Gould
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How do I ask my shrink to stop responding to everything I say with, Too much information! and then giggling behind a pillow?
Dana Gould
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When I finally invent a time machine you will already know about it because I'll have told you a long time ago.
Dana Gould
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Strap On spelled backwards is No Parts. Just sayin'.
Dana Gould
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The best part of chronic head lice is it takes away your fear of dying alone.
Dana Gould
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As hard as I try to live with some degree of faith in my life, I just can't believe that the full moon can turn dude into a wolf.
Dana Gould
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To me 30 isn't old. But it's definitely the beginning of no longer young. Because you notice little subtle things happen to you. You'll be in your car driving around listening to the radio and hear stuff like, That's was an oldie from The Clash.
Dana Gould