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I got mugged about six months ago. The oddest thing about the entire situation, though, was that I wasn't afraid, which is strange because basically I experience my life through two primary emotions: fear and suppressed fear.

Dana Gould

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Dana Gould
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: August 24
Actor
Comedian
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Hopedale
Massachusetts
Dana John Gould
Dana J. Gould
Wasn
Basically
Situation
Emotions
Though
Six
Fear
Entire
Oddest
Experience
Afraid
Mugged
Two
Months
Suppressed
Thing
Emotion
Primaries
Life
Strange
Primary

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I have all my ex-girlfriends lumped into one big girlfriend I called M.A.N.D.Y.: My, Another Neurotic Disappointment? Yes.
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I think I had an argument with a hypnotist this morning. It makes perfect sense as I have no memory of it.
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Had an audition for a pilot today, but realized I could save gas and help the environment by pissing up a rope here at home!
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I know that big, important things don't just come together overnight, but I've been me for a long time now and it's still not working.
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I don't like to generalize, but if you see a guy with his shirt tucked into his shorts, he's probably killed three or four children.
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Catholic Church reasserts its moral authority on contraception: If God believed in birth control, altar boys would have a uterus.
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Every Thanksgiving we feed the homeless so they may join us as we celebrate other people finding a home.
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Very few positive experiences begin with being told to count back slowly from ten.
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Centuries ago, human beings created marriage. Later, they looked to the sky and dreamt of traveling to the moon. Coincidence?
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I'm no longer afraid of not making enough mistakes.
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I feel sorry for high school teams still named the Cougars. Now what does the coach say? Get out there and play like horny old ladies!
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New synonyms for sex: Going to a family function, getting the hard part over with, anti-fillet. Get it? Sex!
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Why do some bald guys grow ponytails? It it the same reason people too old to run always wear track shoes and sweat pants?
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My father hauled boxes so I could get an education and earn enough money to pay someone to make me lift weights.
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I don't mind being alone when I'm surrounded by people, I just hate being alone when I'm alone.
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Chihuahuas are the perfect pet if you don't have a person in your life who screams and shits their pants every time there's a noise.
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If life begins at conception, but you can be born again later, only to live on eternally after death, what's the big deal about anything?
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The weird thing about old Playboys is knowing that the naked woman is now an old lady. I said weird. I didn't say bad.
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What if you died, and you found out that when you died, we all went to the same place. No Heaven, no Hell, doesn't matter what you did in life - you all go to the same place, regardless. I know a lot of nice people who will be really pissed off. You'll see Gandhi arguing with the doorman.
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When I finally invent a time machine you will already know about it because I'll have told you a long time ago.
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