Quote

Always remember, you don't stop shitting your pants because you grow old. You grow old because you stop shitting your pants.

Dana Gould

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Dana Gould
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: August 24
Actor
Comedian
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Hopedale
Massachusetts
Dana John Gould
Dana J. Gould
Pants
Grow
Stop
Grows
Remember
Always
Shitting

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One day they will invent a time machine and, like the internet, it will be used primarily for boning.
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Here's something you never hear: Now that I've worked through all my emotional issues, I'm free to dedicate my life to ventriloquism!
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Is it still okay to make fun of schizophrenics? There's a little voice in my head that says no.
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How do I ask my shrink to stop responding to everything I say with, Too much information! and then giggling behind a pillow?
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Strap On spelled backwards is No Parts. Just sayin'.
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We come into this world naked, covered in our own blood, screaming in terror - and it doesn't have to stop there if you know how to live right
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We would have never gotten mace had someone not thought, There must be a good way to burn someone's eyes.
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Life imitates art but art intimidates life.
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If there's one thing worse than being really angry for no reason, it's suddenly remembering the reason.
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The Cadillac Escalade is the perfect vehicle for a pimp with a growing family.
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Rejected names for World War II: 'Global Super Killfest', 'Germaniacal Japandamonium', 'World War 1: New Moon'.
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Drum Competitions are called such because no one wants to win the big Beat Off.
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If you want to see what I'll look like as an old guy, check out any recent photo of me.
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I'm going to live until I die, and everything in between is just another excuse to eat peanut butter.
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If God is all powerful, and Jesus is the son of God, why did He make His birthday fall on Christmas?
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Cotton candy. Like eating a cloud of diabetes.
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Very few positive experiences begin with being told to count back slowly from ten.
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