Quote

They say that God is in the details. Then again, they also say that the Devil is in the details. Boy, talk about awkward.

Dana Gould

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Dana Gould
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: August 24
Actor
Comedian
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Hopedale
Massachusetts
Dana John Gould
Dana J. Gould
Details
Devil
Boys
Talk
Also
Awkward

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Something tells me that Mitt Romney's sex face is the same as his regular face.
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A great way to be left alone on the subway is to appear to be deep in conversation with a small knife.
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Christ was born in a manger, laying down amongst donkeys ang goats. He was given gifts of incense and perfume. No kidding.
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Life is like The Muppet Show, but instead of Muppets there's anxiety.
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My daughter will say she's hungry, and I'm like, 'Buddy, you're just bored. Do you understand? And you're already starting a pattern of satisfying an internal disconnect with an external stimulation, and that's a dead-end road, sweetie. Courtney Love lives on that road you don't want to live on that road.
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If you want to see what I'll look like as an old guy, check out any recent photo of me.
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As Global Warming raises temparatures, it takes longer to cool pies on window sills, and I wonder if this whole thing was caused by hobos.
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I like my coffee the way I like my women: after waiting impatiently in a long line.
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To really make it look like Santa came, I put reindeer poop on the roof. It's just so cold up there with my pants down.
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I don't want to say my mom is late on trends, but this morning she said, Have a shagadelic day, sweetheart.
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One great way to mess with devout Christians and atheists would be if Jesus came back and said, By the way, you know I'm fake, right?
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Whenever someone starts a statement with, Let me tell you the kind of guy I am, that is a great time to start sawing your own head off.
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Cotton candy. Like eating a cloud of diabetes.
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Why do some bald guys grow ponytails? It it the same reason people too old to run always wear track shoes and sweat pants?
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There's nothing like a string of Xmas lights inside the house to make the whole family feel like they live in a vintage clothing store.
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I love it when dogs yawn. Especially when it's in the middle of another dog's speech.
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Every time the circus comes to town, I can't help thinking, Somewhere out there, there's clown semen.
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Want to be happy? Don't live competitively. Be content who you are. Live at peace with yourself and the losers below you.
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It might not be rational, but I am terrified of getting stuck in an elevator with a bear.
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My dogs love me. Of course, by love I mean poop and by me I mean everywhere.
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