Quote

The magazine at the health food store said, Stop Aging! Isn't that what death is for? Trust me, we're all gonna stop aging.

Dana Gould

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Dana Gould
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: August 24
Actor
Comedian
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Hopedale
Massachusetts
Dana John Gould
Dana J. Gould
Stop
Store
Death
Magazines
Aging
Stores
Gonna
Health
Trust
Food
Magazine

More quotes by Dana Gould

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Why do I always meet women as I'm leaving the dog park with a big bag of poop? And it's always on the day I forgot my dog.
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In the land of the blind, the one-eyed man will probably end up dating the best looking blind chick.
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Anything is possible if you believe in yourself, said the guidance counsellor, stifling a laugh.
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One great way to mess with devout Christians and atheists would be if Jesus came back and said, By the way, you know I'm fake, right?
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How come, when people wear half shirts, it's always the top half?
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If you read angry political blogs, substitute Obama with my daddy and you'll usually learn a lot about the author.
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Just because one pedophile is a football coach, please don't turn against all pedophiles.
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My fantasy football team got mixed up in another fantasy and now they're stuck on a pirate ship with a chick in a Catwoman suit.
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I like to think of Doritos as emotional packing material to safeguard the feelings I've swallowed.
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I want to leave the world as I entered it: naked and crying in a room full of strangers.
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Whenever someone starts a statement with, Let me tell you the kind of guy I am, that is a great time to start sawing your own head off.
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The more women walk around in sweat pants, the harder it is to tell who's out jogging and who's running away from a mugger.
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Very few positive experiences begin with being told to count back slowly from ten.
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Maybe the next three Star Wars movies will tell the story of how the last three Star Wars movies got so shitty.
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As hard as I try to live with some degree of faith in my life, I just can't believe that the full moon can turn dude into a wolf.
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I love it when dogs yawn. Especially when it's in the middle of another dog's speech.
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Competition is the death of art.
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Rejected names for World War II: 'Global Super Killfest', 'Germaniacal Japandamonium', 'World War 1: New Moon'.
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Life is like jury duty. Just do it and get it over with.
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We would have never gotten mace had someone not thought, There must be a good way to burn someone's eyes.
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