Quote

A mom and dad found an S&M magazine under their 10-year-old son's bed, and the dad said, 'Well, we sure can't spank him.'

Dana Carvey

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Dana Carvey
Age: 69
Born: 1955
Born: June 2
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Missoula
Montana
Dana Thomas Carvey
Son
Year
Sure
Spank
Found
Magazine
Wells
Magazines
Well
Bed
Years
Dad
Mom

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You know, sometimes you can't just take an armadillo, put it in the barn, light it on fire and expect it to make licorice.
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My characters all start with rhythms and sounds. Once I hear the voice and get into the rhythm, the attitude and the physicality just come out on their own.
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You know ladies and gentlemen, a long time ago , there were lots of people, but that was a long time ago
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I never read the tabloids.
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Well, I loved variety in television, I loved sketch comedy. At 'Saturday Night Live,' I stayed almost seven years.
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I'm a friend of the CEO of Twitter and he showed me how to be on it, but it causes such an uproar if what you post is perceived in a negative light.
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While many comics have a secret persona, I fundamentally want to be myself.
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It's almost like he's started to sound even more exotic the more people started doing him. I don't know why, but there's just something about Al Gore that makes me laugh.
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I did a lot of ridiculous television. Between 1980 and '85 I had no confidence, so I did everything I was told to do.
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If you just kind of live a regular life and make good 'Hollywood' money, you have a certain freedom.
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I'm thirty years old, but I read at the thirty-four-year-old level.
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I think ABC sort of hoped I would be really like Carol Burnett. I mean literally, I think.
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I enjoy pushing my characters to the limit. No matter how far out there I go, I look for things that make the characters human.
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I think free speech is probably the coolest thing we have in this country, and again, you can label it hate speech and dismiss it, and then you're allowed to censor it.
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The two things that can hurt you are if you need money or if you need fame. Those are the things that can be your Achilles' heel. But if you don't need money and you don't need fame, then you're free.
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Describing comic sensibility is near impossible. It's sort of an abstract silliness, that sometimes the joke isn't the star.
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You know, Elizabeth Taylor must be in Heaven going, 'Alright, fire two honey!'
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I had auditioned for 'Saturday Night Live' two or three times before and never really saw myself there. I looked up to Belushi and Bill Murray and Aykroyd and I never saw myself as in their world.
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I really enjoy being a dad, and maybe I took it too seriously, but I love being around my kids.
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Am I not turtley enough for the Turtle Club? Turtle! Turtle!
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