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Relationships are monuments build on lies

Dan Savage

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Dan Savage
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: October 7
Author
Journalist
Podcaster
Sex Educator
Writer
Chicago
Illinois
Daniel Keenan Savage
Monument
Relationships
Build
Lies
Lying
Monuments

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I feel like I'm a compassionate guy, but I also feel if somebody's grip on life or sanity is so tenuous that a joke in an advice column that usually is nothing but jokes pushes them over the edge, then if not me, it would have been a leaf blowing past them that did it, or something else. You almost have to feel that way, doing this.
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You want to help gay kids, you have to reach them in middle school and high school, when they're being bullied.
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I think the best thing for you to do is just live your life. Live a life that's worth living, one where you do what you want to do, pursue your passions. That way, if you meet someone, they'll be joining a life that's already really good.
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the truth is often a mixed message
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I have a thick skin, but I have a heart.
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A certain tiny percentage of everyone is gay.
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Ultimately life is disease, death and oblivion. It's still better than high school.
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If sex isn't an important part of your marriage, you can't beef if your wife or husband does this unimportant thing with somebody else every once in a while, if you have no interest in it.
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To be gay is nothing to be proud of. It's in how you are gay that you have something to be proud of, considering the obstacles placed in your path if you are gay.
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Christmas can have a real melancholy aspect, 'cause it packages itself as this idea of perfect family cohesion and love, and you're always going to come up short when you measure your personal life against the idealized personal lives that are constantly thrust in our faces, primarily by TV commercials.
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A huge part of what animates homophobia among young people is paranoia and fear of their own capacity to be gay themselves.
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Sedaris, in his essay in the It Gets Better book, writes that when he was growing up nobody called him gay because you might as well have called him a warlock. Nobody knew what gay was.
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The cultural expectation should be if there's infidelity, the marriage is more important than fidelity.
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I don't write about my life in my column.
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If kids got raped at Denny's as often as they get raped at church it would be illegal to take your kids to Denny's.
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I think it's going to take three or four generations of gay people being able to get married before it starts feeling less like we're going through these motions, that we're aping a heterosexual institution.
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Like it or not children are being raised by gay and lesbian parents all over America - as many as 10 million children. And it does nothing to make their lives more stable and secure to attack their families, to attack their parents to prevent us from marrying each other.
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every relationship you are in will fail, until one doesn't
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And that really captures the difference for the bullied straight kid versus the bullied gay kid, is that the bullied straight kid goes home to a shoulder to cry on and support and can talk freely about his experience at school and why he's being bullied. [...] And I couldn't go home and open up to my parents.
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Sometimes I talk to religious people about my column or what I do, and I ask them to, you know, read 20 or 30 of them and then come tell me that the message at the heart of every column isn't, 'Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.' In every possible sense.
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