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In Manhattan, marriage is a trend. Couples kiss over their arugula and radicchio salads. They fondle each other's genitals while devouring their pasta puttanesca. By the time the tiramisu arrives, they've slid under the table.

Cynthia Heimel

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Cynthia Heimel
Age: 70 †
Born: 1947
Born: July 13
Died: 2018
Died: February 25
Novelist
Writer
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
Marriage
Manhattan
Genitals
Funny
Trends
Slid
Time
Kiss
Devouring
Humorous
Pasta
Table
Arrives
Tables
Couples
Arugula
Kissing
Salad
Fondle
Couple
Trend
Salads

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Swingers are all from the suburbs and consequently brain-addled by car pools, shopping malls, and welcome wagons.
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we know that our world is corrupt and diseased but we're tired of being cynical and feeling helpless. What the hell, tilt at a windmill.
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Your whole being is involved in taking care of someone else, worrying about what they think of you, how they treat you, how you can make them treat you better. Right now everyone in the world seems to think that they are codependent and that they come from dysfunctional families. They call it codependency. I call it the human condition.
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Lots of you know me as a lone, hard-bitten columnist, prone to lurking on deserted rocky promontories while searching for my muse.
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You can't take away knowledge, and it's dangerous to pretend you never had it.
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It seems to me, correct me if I'm wrong, that there are an awful lot of people in Manhattan. And it's getting worse.
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Wearing makeup is an apology for our actual faces.
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Women wearing men's clothes are chic, men wearing women's clothes make us fall on the floor laughing.
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a car is just a moving, giant handbag! You never have actually to carry groceries, or dry cleaning, or anything! You can have five pairs of shoes with you at all times!
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[On her dogs:] I have four now. My friends tell me if I get any more they'll have to hold an intervention.
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You know what we can be like: see a guy and think he's cute one minute, the next minute our brains have us married with kids, the following minute we see him having an extramarital affair. By the time someone says, 'I'd like you to meet Cecil,' we shout, 'You're late again with the child support!'
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Reading is an escape, an education, a delving into the brain of another human being on such an intimate level that every nuance of thought, every snapping of synapse, every slippery desire of the author is laid open before you like, well, a book.
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The buying of a self-help book is the most desperate of all human acts. It means you've lost your mind completely: You've entrusted your mental health to a self-aggrandizing twit with a psychology degree and a yen for a yacht.
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The only women who don't believe that sexual harassment is a real problem in this country are women who have never been in the workplace.
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Never judge someone by who he's in love with judge him by his friends. People fall in love with the most appalling people.
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All men are not slimy warthogs. Some men are silly giraffes, some woebegone puppies, some insecure frogs. But if one is not careful, those slimy warthogs can ruin it for all the others.
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This is New York, a combat zone, and everyone has to have an angle or they're not allowed over the bridges or through the tunnels. Let them have their angles, it's what they live for. You've got better things to worry about, like making sure the people that actually matter don't try any funny stuff.
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Dogs are us, only innocent.
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The country is suffering from musical-chairs syndrome. We all dance around for a bit and then when we try to sit down again, somebody doesn't have a chair. We're running scared we want ours.
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I remember the day we were hanging around the band's commune and Roger came in with the press kit for a rock band (Moby Grape) any of us had ever seen. It looked psychedelic, yet it was done by ad people. I believe the word hype was coined on that very day.
Cynthia Heimel