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The media know exactly what they're doing, focusing our attention on Arsenio's hairdo. We need to keep our brains brimming with rubbish. If we didn't, we might think about things.

Cynthia Heimel

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Cynthia Heimel
Age: 70 †
Born: 1947
Born: July 13
Died: 2018
Died: February 25
Novelist
Writer
Philadelphia
Pennsylvania
Might
Journalism
Need
Exactly
Needs
Media
Hairdo
Things
Brain
Hairdos
Think
Attention
Brimming
Thinking
Funny
Rubbish
Keep
Focusing
Didn
Brains

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In Manhattan, marriage is a trend. Couples kiss over their arugula and radicchio salads. They fondle each other's genitals while devouring their pasta puttanesca. By the time the tiramisu arrives, they've slid under the table.
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Your whole being is involved in taking care of someone else, worrying about what they think of you, how they treat you, how you can make them treat you better. Right now everyone in the world seems to think that they are codependent and that they come from dysfunctional families. They call it codependency. I call it the human condition.
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I remember the day we were hanging around the band's commune and Roger came in with the press kit for a rock band (Moby Grape) any of us had ever seen. It looked psychedelic, yet it was done by ad people. I believe the word hype was coined on that very day.
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Swingers are all from the suburbs and consequently brain-addled by car pools, shopping malls, and welcome wagons.
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Women are not ladies. The term connotates females who are simultaneously put on a pedestal and patronized.
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success in L.A. is completely arbitrary. One day you're the brilliant genius of life, the next day people act like there's a bad smell when you approach. Lots of expensive, late-model cars are offered in the L.A. Times every day by people who have suddenly begun to smell bad. The stakes are just too high for human dignity.
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Contrary to popular cable TV-induced opinion, aerobics have nothing to do with squeezing our body into hideous shiny Spandex, grinning like a deranged orangutan, and doing cretinous steps to debauched disco music.
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Wearing makeup is an apology for our actual faces.
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You can't take away knowledge, and it's dangerous to pretend you never had it.
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The buying of a self-help book is the most desperate of all human acts. It means you've lost your mind completely: You've entrusted your mental health to a self-aggrandizing twit with a psychology degree and a yen for a yacht.
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In New York we have streets exploding and innocent Buddhist girls being stabbed in the neck and cabdrivers refusing to help her. If we happen into a nightclub by mistake, when we leave the doorman will be lying in the street surrounded by police.
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We have to have faith in ourselves. I have never met a woman who, deep down in her core, really believes she has great legs. And if she suspects that she might have great legs, then she's convinced that she has a shrill voice and no neck.
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Friends are the twenty-first-century version of extended families.
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Reading is an escape, an education, a delving into the brain of another human being on such an intimate level that every nuance of thought, every snapping of synapse, every slippery desire of the author is laid open before you like, well, a book.
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You know what we can be like: see a guy and think he's cute one minute, the next minute our brains have us married with kids, the following minute we see him having an extramarital affair. By the time someone says, 'I'd like you to meet Cecil,' we shout, 'You're late again with the child support!'
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Lots of you know me as a lone, hard-bitten columnist, prone to lurking on deserted rocky promontories while searching for my muse.
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It seems to me, correct me if I'm wrong, that there are an awful lot of people in Manhattan. And it's getting worse.
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A comedian is not funny unless he is taking his demons out for a walk.
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it is a shoe designer's job to be a year ahead of our collective unconscious.
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Show me a woman who is prouder of her clean kitchen than of her collection of lingerie and I'll show you a woman with enlarged pores.
Cynthia Heimel