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Tom Ridge now says we don't have to run out and put plastic sheets all over the house. Great, tell that to my dead parakeet.

Craig Kilborn

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Craig Kilborn
Age: 62
Born: 1962
Born: August 24
Actor
Basketball Player
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Kansas City
Missouri
House
Parakeets
Running
Ridge
Tell
Ridges
Great
Toms
Sheets
Plastic
Dead
Says
Parakeet

More quotes by Craig Kilborn

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Federal authorities have informed Martha Stewart's lawyers she will be indicted for her role in the ImClone insider trading scandal. Good news for Martha - stripes are back in this year.
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President Bush is not fazed by other candidates' war records. He said, I may have not fought in Vietnam, but I created one.
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Apparently, six women claim that Arnold Schwarzenegger groped them while working on his movies. Hats off to these women who admit they worked on Arnold's movies.
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President Bush announced a billion dollar mission to the moon and Mars. He came up with a snappy new slogan - to drill where no man has drilled before.
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With Iraq plunging into chaos and gas prices at record highs President Bush took time out this weekend for a ride on his bicycle, but unfortunately he fell off and sustained cuts to his face and hands. Apparently Bush was distracted by the enormous responsibilities of the presidency. I'm just kidding. He hit some gravel or something.
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I think mankind is overly sensitive, very needy, greedy, and flawed.
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As John Kerry sails toward the Democratic nomination, new questions are emerging about President Bush's service in the National Guard, like where he was for six months in 1972 and why he refused to take a routine physical. President Bush has vowed to get to the bottom of this right after Election Day.
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John Kerry will undergo surgery to repair his right shoulder. He originally hurt it when he suddenly switched positions on Iraq.
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John Kerry will be the Democratic nominee for president. Democrats finally found someone who is Al Gore without the flash and the sizzle.
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President Bush says in the last month he has created 300,000 new jobs. Yeah, they're called Kerry campaign workers.
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Singer Boy Dylan was stopped at his own sow by security guards who failed to recognize the singer. Asked to comment, Dylan replied, 'I can hardly blame them. Look at me.'
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Did you see the statue topple? Bill Clinton got nostalgic seeing something that big in a beret go down.
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I think that you're always going to have some people who are negative or view you in a certain way.
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It's not a big part, ... I wheel in an ultrasound machine and say to Taylor's gynecologist, 'If you have a problem with it, just give it a light tap on the side.' Then they hand me a urine sample, and I put it up to the light and say 'Hmm, looks pretty healthy, but I'll check.'
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California's economy is declining so rapidly that candidates are asking 'Are you better off now then you were four minutes ago?'
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There was an embarrassing moment at a recent Democratic fundraiser. When John Kerry was handed a $10 million dollar check, he said, 'I do.'
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I don't want to scare anybody here but we just received word from police that Howard Dean is loose and may be armed with a microphone.
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I have a wonderful respect for old people.
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George W. Bush even stopped in Pennsylvania to try his hand at the lotto and gave up when he could only think of the numbers 4 and 17
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I always tell people I romanticize about doing something simple, like doing radio in northern California.
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