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You may have heard this, that NASA discovered water on Mars When he heard about the water on Mars, President Bush said, 'Is it regular or unleaded?'

Craig Kilborn

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Craig Kilborn
Age: 62
Born: 1962
Born: August 24
Actor
Basketball Player
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Kansas City
Missouri
Regular
Bush
Discovered
Heard
Water
President
May
Nasa
Mars

More quotes by Craig Kilborn

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Today, John Kerry announced a fool-proof plan to wipe out the $500B deficit. John Kerry has a plan, he's going to put it on his wife's Gold Card.
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President Bush says in the last month he has created 300,000 new jobs. Yeah, they're called Kerry campaign workers.
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President Bush is not fazed by other candidates' war records. He said, I may have not fought in Vietnam, but I created one.
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President Bush announced a billion dollar mission to the moon and Mars. He came up with a snappy new slogan - to drill where no man has drilled before.
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My brother asked me once, 'Are you a misanthrope?' And I said, 'No, I just find people irritating.'
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Howard Dean is narrowing the field of potential running mates. It's down to Mike Tyson or Bobby Knight.
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I don't do well around the angry, bitter and emotionally fragile among us, which may eliminate 70% of the population.
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I have a wonderful respect for old people.
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Did you see the statue topple? Bill Clinton got nostalgic seeing something that big in a beret go down.
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Singer Boy Dylan was stopped at his own sow by security guards who failed to recognize the singer. Asked to comment, Dylan replied, 'I can hardly blame them. Look at me.'
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As the Democrats get revved up at their convention in Boston, President Bush is fighting back the only way he knows how: by going on vacation! Ah, it's nice to take a rest, replenish your supply of smirks. The vacation was expected, because Bush traditionally takes a month off every summer to relax and avoid reading National Security Warnings.
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If loving you is wrong, then I'll just like you a whole bunch!
Craig Kilborn
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While there's no 'I' in team, there's also no 'you', okay? So back off.
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Yesterday Jerry Springer bowed out of the Ohio Senate race. He said, 'If I can't run the most embarrassing campaign in America, then I'm out of here.'
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Apparently, six women claim that Arnold Schwarzenegger groped them while working on his movies. Hats off to these women who admit they worked on Arnold's movies.
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Comedy doesn't always have to come from a dark place.
Craig Kilborn
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Bush said the unemployment situation is turning around. Last week alone, 5,000 people started working for John Kerry.
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Today Homeland Security Chief Tom Ridge lowered the terror alert from orange to yellow. Does anybody need 16 miles of duct tape?
Craig Kilborn
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President Bush has delivered a new resolution to the U.N. saying that Saddam has failed to cooperate with U.N. resolutions, freeing us to get our war on. Don't mess with us France, or we'll send Jerry Lewis to Iraq as a human shield.
Craig Kilborn
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The prison scandal is really hurting President Bush's poll numbers. In fact, I hear he's already working on his concession smirk.
Craig Kilborn