Quote

Comedy doesn't always have to come from a dark place.

Craig Kilborn

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Craig Kilborn
Age: 62
Born: 1962
Born: August 24
Actor
Basketball Player
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Kansas City
Missouri
Come
Always
Comedy
Dark
Doesn
Place

More quotes by Craig Kilborn

Image
People here in Los Angeles are disgusted now about a sex scandal involving Arnold Schwarzenegger. Apparently for seven years, he carried on a sexual relationship with his own wife.
Craig Kilborn
Image
Singer Boy Dylan was stopped at his own sow by security guards who failed to recognize the singer. Asked to comment, Dylan replied, 'I can hardly blame them. Look at me.'
Craig Kilborn
Image
I enjoyed retirement the right way linguine con vongole, red wine and plenty of truffle cheese.
Craig Kilborn
Image
I lived in a studio apartment until my mid-30s. I don't have an extravagant lifestyle.
Craig Kilborn
Image
President Bush is not fazed by other candidates' war records. He said, I may have not fought in Vietnam, but I created one.
Craig Kilborn
Image
Bryant Gumbel is thrilled about his CBS deal and can't wait to start alienating the staff of an entirely new network.
Craig Kilborn
Image
President Bush has delivered a new resolution to the U.N. saying that Saddam has failed to cooperate with U.N. resolutions, freeing us to get our war on. Don't mess with us France, or we'll send Jerry Lewis to Iraq as a human shield.
Craig Kilborn
Image
I always tell people I romanticize about doing something simple, like doing radio in northern California.
Craig Kilborn
Image
George W. Bush even stopped in Pennsylvania to try his hand at the lotto and gave up when he could only think of the numbers 4 and 17
Craig Kilborn
Image
The big political news, Arnold Schwarzenegger announced he's running for governor of California, and already, people are chanting, 'Four more vowels, four more vowels.
Craig Kilborn
Image
My brother asked me once, 'Are you a misanthrope?' And I said, 'No, I just find people irritating.'
Craig Kilborn
Image
You may have heard this, that NASA discovered water on Mars When he heard about the water on Mars, President Bush said, 'Is it regular or unleaded?'
Craig Kilborn
Image
As the Democrats get revved up at their convention in Boston, President Bush is fighting back the only way he knows how: by going on vacation! Ah, it's nice to take a rest, replenish your supply of smirks. The vacation was expected, because Bush traditionally takes a month off every summer to relax and avoid reading National Security Warnings.
Craig Kilborn
Image
While there's no 'I' in team, there's also no 'you', okay? So back off.
Craig Kilborn
Image
Apparently, six women claim that Arnold Schwarzenegger groped them while working on his movies. Hats off to these women who admit they worked on Arnold's movies.
Craig Kilborn
Image
As John Kerry sails toward the Democratic nomination, new questions are emerging about President Bush's service in the National Guard, like where he was for six months in 1972 and why he refused to take a routine physical. President Bush has vowed to get to the bottom of this right after Election Day.
Craig Kilborn
Image
There was an embarrassing moment at a recent Democratic fundraiser. When John Kerry was handed a $10 million dollar check, he said, 'I do.'
Craig Kilborn
Image
John Kerry announced his plan for how to handle those poor naked prisoners. His wife is going to buy them all a $1,000 Armani suit.
Craig Kilborn
Image
Bush said the unemployment situation is turning around. Last week alone, 5,000 people started working for John Kerry.
Craig Kilborn
Image
Federal authorities have informed Martha Stewart's lawyers she will be indicted for her role in the ImClone insider trading scandal. Good news for Martha - stripes are back in this year.
Craig Kilborn