Quote

Yesterday Jerry Springer bowed out of the Ohio Senate race. He said, 'If I can't run the most embarrassing campaign in America, then I'm out of here.'

Craig Kilborn

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Craig Kilborn
Age: 62
Born: 1962
Born: August 24
Actor
Basketball Player
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Kansas City
Missouri
Running
Ohio
America
Jerry
Embarrassing
Senate
Campaign
Campaigns
Yesterday
Springer
Race
Bowed

More quotes by Craig Kilborn

Image
It's not a big part, ... I wheel in an ultrasound machine and say to Taylor's gynecologist, 'If you have a problem with it, just give it a light tap on the side.' Then they hand me a urine sample, and I put it up to the light and say 'Hmm, looks pretty healthy, but I'll check.'
Craig Kilborn
Image
With Iraq plunging into chaos and gas prices at record highs President Bush took time out this weekend for a ride on his bicycle, but unfortunately he fell off and sustained cuts to his face and hands. Apparently Bush was distracted by the enormous responsibilities of the presidency. I'm just kidding. He hit some gravel or something.
Craig Kilborn
Image
California's economy is declining so rapidly that candidates are asking 'Are you better off now then you were four minutes ago?'
Craig Kilborn
Image
Democrats were quick to point out that President Bush's budget creates a 1 trillion dollar deficit. The White House quickly responded with 'Hey, look over there, it's Saddam Hussein.'
Craig Kilborn
Image
President Bush announced a billion dollar mission to the moon and Mars. He came up with a snappy new slogan - to drill where no man has drilled before.
Craig Kilborn
Image
I don't want to scare anybody here but we just received word from police that Howard Dean is loose and may be armed with a microphone.
Craig Kilborn
Image
I enjoyed retirement the right way linguine con vongole, red wine and plenty of truffle cheese.
Craig Kilborn
Image
Over ten thousand people have signed a petition to recall Governor Schwarzenegger. I'm sorry, that is next year's joke.
Craig Kilborn
Image
Howard Dean is narrowing the field of potential running mates. It's down to Mike Tyson or Bobby Knight.
Craig Kilborn
Image
President Bush says in the last month he has created 300,000 new jobs. Yeah, they're called Kerry campaign workers.
Craig Kilborn
Image
Singer Boy Dylan was stopped at his own sow by security guards who failed to recognize the singer. Asked to comment, Dylan replied, 'I can hardly blame them. Look at me.'
Craig Kilborn
Image
Declassified papers report that John Kennedy was taking eight different medications a day. He was so wasted, his Secret Service code name was Ted Kennedy.
Craig Kilborn
Image
You may have heard this, that NASA discovered water on Mars When he heard about the water on Mars, President Bush said, 'Is it regular or unleaded?'
Craig Kilborn
Image
People here in Los Angeles are disgusted now about a sex scandal involving Arnold Schwarzenegger. Apparently for seven years, he carried on a sexual relationship with his own wife.
Craig Kilborn
Image
Bryant Gumbel is thrilled about his CBS deal and can't wait to start alienating the staff of an entirely new network.
Craig Kilborn
Image
The prison scandal is really hurting President Bush's poll numbers. In fact, I hear he's already working on his concession smirk.
Craig Kilborn
Image
Critics say Arnold has no previous government experience, but advisers say he's clearly the most qualified Austrian, ex-Mr. Universe in the race.
Craig Kilborn
Image
As John Kerry sails toward the Democratic nomination, new questions are emerging about President Bush's service in the National Guard, like where he was for six months in 1972 and why he refused to take a routine physical. President Bush has vowed to get to the bottom of this right after Election Day.
Craig Kilborn
Image
President Bush is not fazed by other candidates' war records. He said, I may have not fought in Vietnam, but I created one.
Craig Kilborn
Image
There was an embarrassing moment at a recent Democratic fundraiser. When John Kerry was handed a $10 million dollar check, he said, 'I do.'
Craig Kilborn