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My son's always showing me pictures of dinosaurs and asking me what their names are. I dont know so I make stuff up: That son is a thesaurus.
Craig Ferguson
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Craig Ferguson
Age: 62
Born: 1962
Born: May 17
Aircraft Pilot
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Novelist
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Talk Show Host
Television Actor
Glasgow
Scotland
Always
Dont
Showing
Pictures
Son
Asking
Names
Stuff
Thesaurus
Make
Dinosaurs
More quotes by Craig Ferguson
Valentine's Day is celebrated a little differently here in L.A. Nobody eats chocolate because of the calories, so people give each other tofu-shaped boxes filled with bean curd. Then they fantasize about what their Pilates instructor would be like if he was straight.
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By the power of Steven Wright's Beard!
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Welcome back, my cheeky wee monkeys.
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I'm so excited about the new iPad, I just iPeed my iPants.
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I view my own body as a petting zoo. I am the main attraction... And the only customer.
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Here in Los Angeles, school's out for summer. For thousands of school kids, this is the first week of summer vacation. And for thousands of parents, it's the first week of hell.
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New iPod. It looks like an iPhone but it can't make phone calls. So its really just an iPhone.
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I'm not so much a dragon slayer, more a dragon annoyer -- I'm a dragon irritater.
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The first day of spring is known as the vernal equinox. The equinox is special. It only happens twice a year, like a good night in ratings for NBC.
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Rush Limbaugh says if the health care bill passes, he will leave the country. The Democrats are upset, because if they knew that, they would have passed the bill years ago.
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