Quote

Justin Bieber's tour bus was stopped by Canadian border patrol agents. And they found marijuana. The agents said Bieber was a disgrace to Canada and should never come back. Then they found the marijuana.

Craig Ferguson

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TAGS & TOPICS

Craig Ferguson
Age: 62
Born: 1962
Born: May 17
Aircraft Pilot
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Novelist
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Talk Show Host
Television Actor
Glasgow
Scotland
Agents
Justin
Canada
Canadian
Stopped
Disgrace
Found
Border
Back
Bus
Come
Tour
Never
Marijuana
Borders
Patrol

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A new restaurant here in Southern California requires women to wear high heels. I'm outraged! This is sexist! Why just the women?
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Change is the law of God's mind and resistance to it is the source of all pain.
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For the first time in history, Congress has 100 women in it. Congratulations. Welcome to modern times, America. It's great having 100 women in Congress. Unless you're in line for the congressional bathroom.
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Historically, when Americans don't know what to do next, they go to Paris. Benjamin Franklin is like: 'What am I going to do now? I'll go to Paris!'
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I don't see my show as a stepping stone to something else like some people, who get a job then have a foot out the door looking for their next job.
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I think commercialism helps Christmas and I think that the more capitalism we can inject into the Christmas holiday the more spiritual I feel about it
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What we do have is nothin' but time. Welcome to the Shawshank Redemption of late night!
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I always appreciated my teachers. When I was 16, I gave them the greatest gift I could think of. I dropped out of school.
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Tomorrow is your future's yesterday.
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It's a great day for America, everybody! It's Monday, woo.
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That's why Credit card companies are evil. Are they sponsoring the show tonight? ... They are Evil.
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If you know anything about me - and, if you do, I'm sorry that your life turned out like that.
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Much of television has been homogenized in the desire to avoid annoying or upsetting people.
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My son's always showing me pictures of dinosaurs and asking me what their names are. I dont know so I make stuff up: That son is a thesaurus.
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There are rumors that there is a John Edwards sex tape. People say it's twenty minutes of Edwards caressing and stroking...And that's just the part where he fixes his hair.
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