Quote

I always wanted to make motion pictures, ever since I was a wee boy, and I was 32, and time was marching on. I met a guy who said, 'Come out to Hollywood for 10 days, and I'll get you a deal.' So I figured, 'OK, 10 days.' On the 10th day, he got me a development deal with Disney, not for a lot of money, but it allowed me to make the move.

Craig Ferguson

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Craig Ferguson
Age: 62
Born: 1962
Born: May 17
Aircraft Pilot
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Novelist
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Talk Show Host
Television Actor
Glasgow
Scotland
Time
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Hollywood
Moving
Development
Marching
Money
Deal
Disney
Ever
Move
Figured
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Motion
Come
Boys
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Make
Days
Allowed
Always
Since
Mets

More quotes by Craig Ferguson

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From this moment on I'd dedicate my life to rock and roll and take as many drugs as possible. What could possibly go wrong?
Craig Ferguson
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Here in Los Angeles, school's out for summer. For thousands of school kids, this is the first week of summer vacation. And for thousands of parents, it's the first week of hell.
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For me, comedy should have a certain amount of joy in it. It should be about attacking the powerful - the politicians, the Trumps, the blowhards - going after them. We shouldn't be attacking the vulnerable.
Craig Ferguson
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Larry King has been married more times than Henry the Eighth. We used to have that rhyme to keep track of them. 'Divorced, beheaded, died. Divorced, beheaded, survived.' With Larry I think it goes, 'Divorced, beheaded, divorced, escaped. Zombie, lesbian, disappeared, inflatable.
Craig Ferguson
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The devil is not abroad at night in the form of a cat or a wolf or any other animal. He lives eternally in the hearts of men.
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I love zombies. If any monster could Riverdance, it would be zombies.
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It's Earth Day today. Let me tell you something about polar bears. They're endangered but you have to be careful because a polar bear is one of the few animals that will stalk a human. If you go to where polar bears live, it might stalk you and when you're on the plane going home, it might be behind you reading.
Craig Ferguson
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I view my own body as a petting zoo. I am the main attraction... And the only customer.
Craig Ferguson
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She still cared for me, and the best way I could make amends to her was to be happy. I do have a knack for finding great women.
Craig Ferguson
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Stand by your bed and salute me.
Craig Ferguson
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Here in California, we passed a law against texting while driving. But there's no law preventing you from writing a letter while driving.
Craig Ferguson
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I always appreciated my teachers. When I was 16, I gave them the greatest gift I could think of. I dropped out of school.
Craig Ferguson
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Canada is not the party. Its the apartment above the party.
Craig Ferguson
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This book could scare them. The sex, the violence, the dream sequences and the iconoclasm - I think a lot of people are uncomfortable with that. I understand that. It was very uncomfortable to write some of it
Craig Ferguson
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World War Z is out today. The big zombie movie. The trailer looks scary. You see hordes of bodies climbing and rolling over each other. It's like Black Friday at the mall.
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Here's a tip for all you aspiring young comics: Don't beat up the customers. It is very difficult to get laughs from an audience when you've actually drawn blood from one of their number. It kills the mood.
Craig Ferguson
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I'm a vulgar lounge entertainer, I don't need to wear a tie.
Craig Ferguson
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I proved to my own satisfaction that I am madder than I think.
Craig Ferguson
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Here at CBS, spring also means March Madness. I love the name March Madness. I'm glad the PC police haven't made us change March Madness to early spring psychosis.
Craig Ferguson
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What we do have is nothin' but time. Welcome to the Shawshank Redemption of late night!
Craig Ferguson