Quote

Every day I ran to that book like it was a bottle of whiskey and crawled inside because it was a world that I had at least some control over, and slowly, in time, it began to take shape.

Craig Ferguson

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Craig Ferguson
Age: 62
Born: 1962
Born: May 17
Aircraft Pilot
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Novelist
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Talk Show Host
Television Actor
Glasgow
Scotland
Book
Ran
Take
Slowly
Every
Shape
Time
Began
Like
Shapes
Crawled
World
Inside
Whiskey
Control
Bottle
Least
Bottles

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I think I'm just someone that just tries to get by. I'm kind of - if it was during the Second World War, I'd be a black marketeer, I think.
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I do a show. It comes on late at night on TV. And if that means I'm a late-night talk show host, then I guess I am, but in every other regard I resign my commission, I don't care for it.
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You should never protest outside a rich guy's home during the day because he's not there. He's at work grinding the faces of the poor.
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I have a deep and profound mistrust of all politicians.
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I've been running my whole life. Running into bars, running around the world. But when you have a child, you can't run. That was a revelation.
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I've got young kids, so it suits me to do a job which keeps me in town right now.
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A junkie will steal your purse, and then help you look for it.
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Ratings experts say the best way to get people to watch during sweeps is to leave the audience with a question that won't be answered until the next time the show is on. You know, like Who shot J.R.? I like to think I do this every night - the question is, Is this show still on?
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Being an American is something I wanted to be for a very long time, probably since I saw the moon landing when I was a child.
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Great, as long as you're happy
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There's going to be a new cable-TV channel for dogs. Dogs don't even watch TV. But the schedule came out today. And they've got great shows, like Barks & Recreation and Game of Bones.
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On that same tour we ran into a band at Aylesbury Friars, a biggish venue in Oxfordshire, England. They were a four-piece from Ireland called U2. They seemed like nice fellows and they sounded pretty good, but we didn’t keep in touch. They’re probably taxi drivers and accountants by now.
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You can never talk religion on network TV. It makes too many people angry. You can talk about sex.
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I've started looking at my own father a bit funny. He assures me, though, that I really am the son of a Scottish postman.
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I don’t think there’s anything wrong with telling the truth. I know it isn’t fashionable.
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That's why Credit card companies are evil. Are they sponsoring the show tonight? ... They are Evil.
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It is Veterans Day, when we honor everyone who served in all of the campaigns. We honor them with dignity and respect, and of course mattress sales and tire discounts.
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I have no ambitions beyond being comfortable in what I do for a living - and earning a living.
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They say give a man a fish and he'll eat for a day. But teach a man to fish and he'll get his own show on the Discovery Channel.
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People talk to old people like they're children.'Oh you're very old aren't you?' Yeah I'm old. I'm not stupid.
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