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Strange star-like object over Oslo right before Obama arrives. A gift of a golden medal given by a group of wise men... Nah.

Craig Ferguson

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Craig Ferguson
Age: 62
Born: 1962
Born: May 17
Aircraft Pilot
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Novelist
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Talk Show Host
Television Actor
Glasgow
Scotland
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Medal
Strange
Golden
Wise
Object
Stars
Star
Jesus
Obama
Given
Group
Right
Gift
Oslo
Men
Objects
Arrives

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World War Z is out today. The big zombie movie. The trailer looks scary. You see hordes of bodies climbing and rolling over each other. It's like Black Friday at the mall.
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Sometimes my pathology just spills out into the camera doesn't it?
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I come from a very critical culture. You know the Scots. They're always saying: 'Oh, no. It will never work. You'll never amount to anything. You've got to know your place in the world.
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Tomorrow is your future's yesterday.
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I found the prospect daunting, but somehow comforting, too, because the counselors insisted it could be done, and, after all, many of them were recovering alcoholics themselves.
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Stoners just got a powerful new ally in the fight to legalize marijuana - conservative broadcaster Pat Robertson. He said it's time to 'you know, legalize it, tax it, and keep it away from Mel Gibson.'
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Here in Los Angeles, school's out for summer. For thousands of school kids, this is the first week of summer vacation. And for thousands of parents, it's the first week of hell.
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When I stopped drinking, it was only because I thought if I don't stop, I'm going to die.
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Being the executive producer of a film is not that difficult. It just means that you have some power. There's not a huge amount of skill involved, I don't know how much I'm giving away here. I feel like that guy on Fox, giving away the magicians' tricks. It's not rocket science, being an executive producer of a film.
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There's going to be a new cable-TV channel for dogs. Dogs don't even watch TV. But the schedule came out today. And they've got great shows, like Barks & Recreation and Game of Bones.
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A junkie will steal your purse, and then help you look for it.
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A new restaurant here in Southern California requires women to wear high heels. I'm outraged! This is sexist! Why just the women?
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Today Prince William went to Washington, D.C., and he met with President Obama. He said, 'It feels weird being in the White House because I'm not an American.' And then Prince William said, 'Yeah, me too.'
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There's just a feeling you get from certain things you do in life that just kind of feel pure and independent of what's actually, physically, going on.
Craig Ferguson
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If it doesn't work, at least it will be an interesting train wreck.
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For me, comedy should have a certain amount of joy in it. It should be about attacking the powerful - the politicians, the Trumps, the blowhards - going after them. We shouldn't be attacking the vulnerable.
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I think holidays create so much pressure because people feel they should be having a good time. But you shouldn't.
Craig Ferguson
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I dont know how to add things to my own wikipedia page.
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Divorce lawyers stoke anger and fear in their clients, knowing that as long as the conflicts remain unresolved the revenue stream will keep flowing.
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It was on this day that the Bahamas declared independence. Before that they were a British colony. The British Empire lost Canada and the Bahamas, to name just a couple. Britain's been dumped more times than Taylor Swift. But did they go writing whining songs about it? No.
Craig Ferguson