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I have so many evil plans, I'm just trying to find the one which would be best right now!

Colin Mochrie

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Colin Mochrie
Age: 66
Born: 1957
Born: November 30
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Improviser
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Cille Mheàrnaig
Colin Andrew Mochrie
Find
Right
Many
Trying
Would
Plans
Evil
Best

More quotes by Colin Mochrie

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To be a dramatic writer takes hard work, talent, and discipline. And that's why I just make up crap.
Colin Mochrie
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After a disappointing summer, Humpty Dumpty has a great fall.
Colin Mochrie
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It all started with a badly timed bald joke!
Colin Mochrie
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The Hills are alive with the sound of CRAP!
Colin Mochrie
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He had the kind of face only a mother could love. If that mother was blind in one eye, and had that sort of milky film over the other one, ya..ya know, ya know what I mean? But still he was my identical twin.
Colin Mochrie
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I think the challenge is going out in front of a paying audience with absolutely nothing and trying to entertain them for two hours. Thankfully, I only think about that right before we go on, and then once we're out there, everything's fine.
Colin Mochrie
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If Sting retires, would he have to change his name to Stung?
Colin Mochrie
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We'll be back to our nature documentary, 'Baggy the Anorexic Elephant' in just a second.
Colin Mochrie
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There's many times this year I've sat back and thought, I'm making a living from making things up. It's the only skill I have so I've been really lucky.
Colin Mochrie
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Wives live longer than husbands because they're not married to women.
Colin Mochrie
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NASA sends probe to Uranus, people everywhere giggle.
Colin Mochrie
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Our top story tonight: Famous TV dolphin flipper was arrested today on prostitution ring charges. He allegedly was seen transporting two 16 year olds across state line for immoral porpoises.
Colin Mochrie
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This just in: Beverly Hills 90210, Cleveland Browns 3.
Colin Mochrie
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Did you know that..........'embargo' spelled backwards is 'o grab me
Colin Mochrie
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Every song a hit, every hit a smack!
Colin Mochrie
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I am such a pessimist that every project has surpassed what I envisioned.
Colin Mochrie
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My mother on her death bed told me, 'Where the hell did that kangaroo come from!?' - it just popped out of nowhere and punched her in the head and caused a cerebral hemorrhage, so I thought I'd move to a country where there were no kangaroos!
Colin Mochrie
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Give me liberty! Or a bran muffin!
Colin Mochrie
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I was a bookworm. Every week I'd go to the library and get seven books. Remember libraries? I wonder if people still go. And I learned about everything from the library. I came from a Scottish family. Old school.
Colin Mochrie
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And if that isnt the truth, it would be a lie.
Colin Mochrie