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My most important professional accomplishment to date is the ability to keep working with absolutely no skills whatsoever.
Colin Mochrie
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Colin Mochrie
Age: 66
Born: 1957
Born: November 30
Actor
Comedian
Film Actor
Improviser
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Cille Mheàrnaig
Colin Andrew Mochrie
Professional
Absolutely
Skills
Working
Ability
Whatsoever
Keep
Date
Important
Dating
Accomplishment
More quotes by Colin Mochrie
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury. It's not like the sheep was underage.
Colin Mochrie
Hi. There was a big accident, some people got decapitated, here are their names... You know what? That shirt really makes you look fat. I mean, the colour's all wrong... I mean, who shot the drapes?
Colin Mochrie
My mother on her death bed told me, 'Where the hell did that kangaroo come from!?' - it just popped out of nowhere and punched her in the head and caused a cerebral hemorrhage, so I thought I'd move to a country where there were no kangaroos!
Colin Mochrie
Our top story tonight: Famous TV dolphin flipper was arrested today on prostitution ring charges. He allegedly was seen transporting two 16 year olds across state line for immoral porpoises.
Colin Mochrie
I was a bookworm. Every week I'd go to the library and get seven books. Remember libraries? I wonder if people still go. And I learned about everything from the library. I came from a Scottish family. Old school.
Colin Mochrie
When I'm on stage, it's a little world I've created where I'm sort of the thing, so I have total control over everything that happens. When we're improvising, I'm with someone I totally trust. I know things are going to work out. I don't have those guarantees in life. There are no consequences on stage.
Colin Mochrie
For as long as I can remember, I've had memories.
Colin Mochrie
The Hills are alive with the sound of CRAP!
Colin Mochrie
I have so many evil plans, I'm just trying to find the one which would be best right now!
Colin Mochrie
Hi, well soon return you to the dyslexic production of Bitty Bitty Chang Chang.
Colin Mochrie
I think the challenge is going out in front of a paying audience with absolutely nothing and trying to entertain them for two hours. Thankfully, I only think about that right before we go on, and then once we're out there, everything's fine.
Colin Mochrie
He had the kind of face only a mother could love. If that mother was blind in one eye, and had that sort of milky film over the other one, ya..ya know, ya know what I mean? But still he was my identical twin.
Colin Mochrie
But you know, we have more hits than you can possibly think about. One of my personal favorite artists is the wonderful artist named Cher. And although I love much of her late stuff, her early stuff was the stuff that I really, really loved.
Colin Mochrie
This just in: Beverly Hills 90210, Cleveland Browns 3.
Colin Mochrie
NASA sends probe to Uranus, people everywhere giggle.
Colin Mochrie
Hey, come on, I've seen younger faces on money. Money.
Colin Mochrie
Give me liberty! Or a bran muffin!
Colin Mochrie
I don't want to get all lefty, but if we took the defence budgets from around the world, we could end hunger everywhere. I would hope that all the world's leaders are thinking about poverty. Get to work. Do something. This is something that's going to be with us forever.
Colin Mochrie
You don't sweat much for a fat girl.
Colin Mochrie
If Sting retires, would he have to change his name to Stung?
Colin Mochrie
