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To hell with housework, our top priority has always been between our legs.

Chuck Palahniuk

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Chuck Palahniuk
Age: 62
Born: 1962
Born: February 21
Essayist
Journalist
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Pasco
Washington
Charles Michael Chuck Palahniuk
Housework
Priority
Priorities
Legs
Hell
Always

More quotes by Chuck Palahniuk

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Writing is like sex, if it's difficult you're not doing it right.
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It's exhausting, the energy it takes to unknow a truth.
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The difference between how you look and how you see yourself is enough to kill most people. And maybe the reason vampires don’t die is because they can never see themselves in photographs or mirrors.
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My first time I jacked off, I thought I'd invented it. I looked down at my sloppy handful of junk and thought, This is going to make me rich.
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No, Miss Wright didn't want to meet her kid. To her, that relationship was just as important, just as ideal and impossible as it would be to the child. She'd expect that young man to be perfect, smart, and talented, everything to compensate for all the mistakes that she'd made. The whole wasted, unhappy mess of her life.
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Self improvement is masturbation.
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I am the child of a lunatic. Not a child of God.
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Honest is how I want to look. The truth doesn't glitter and shine.
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Doesn't reincarnation strike you as just another form of procrastination?
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When we don't know who to hate, we hate ourselves.
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Demons are former celebrities who prey on their own insecurities.
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You ever wonder when God's coming back with a lot of barbecue sauce?
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Every time we burn a gallon of gas or an acre of rain forest, aren't we killing the future to preserve the present?
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As the child outlives the father,so must the character bury the author.
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I came to Party Crashing because accidents happen. People you love will die. Nothing you treasure will last forever. And I need to accept and embrace that fact.
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If Marilyn Monroe was alive right now, what would she be doing?' Clawing at the roof of her coffin.
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The more things you own, the more they own you.
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Tyler lies back and asks, If Marilyn Monroe were alive right now, what would she be doing? I say, goodnight. The headliner hangs down in shreds from the ceiling and Tyler says, Clawing at the lid of her coffin.
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The worst part of writing fiction is the fear of wasting your life behind a keyboard. The idea that, dying, you'll realize you only lived on paper. Your only adventures were make-believe, and while the world fought and kissed, you sat in some dark room masturbating and making money.
Chuck Palahniuk
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It's okay to cry as long as you're faking it.
Chuck Palahniuk