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You ever wonder when God's coming back with a lot of barbecue sauce?

Chuck Palahniuk

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Chuck Palahniuk
Age: 62
Born: 1962
Born: February 21
Essayist
Journalist
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Pasco
Washington
Charles Michael Chuck Palahniuk
Sauce
Coming
Wonder
Back
Ever
Barbecue

More quotes by Chuck Palahniuk

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I have a secret goal with my editor - he has asthma and uses his inhaler, and after I send him a new manuscript, I'll have his assistant phone me and tell me how many times he had to get his inhaler out while reading a draft. It's my secret laugh meter.
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HELLO! Look at me. HELLO! I am so ZEN. This is BLOOD. This is NOTHING. Hello. Everything is nothing, and it's so cool to be ENLIGHTENED. Like me.
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There's a terrible dark joy when the only person who knows all your secrets is finally dead.
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The world of American politics is more contentious than it has ever been in my lifetime.
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As if you cut open a rag doll with a sill name, and found inside:Real intestines, real lungs, a beating heart and blood. A lot of hot, sticky blood.
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The money is in television. Books are not the dominant medium of our time, so fewer people will create them. In a sad way, books have become a form of comfort food we expect to lull us to sleep.
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I went to sexaholics anonymous for six months. For research. I wanted to see the structure of the groups, how they were conducted, and what the atmosphere was like, and also to be able to describe the people as human beings, rather than as the dirty jokes that they are in our culture.
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Everybody looks a little crazy if you're looking close enough and if you can't look that close, then you don't really love them.
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I will never write a sequel to anything that I will ever write.
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If emotion can create a physical action, then duplicating the physical action can re-create the emotion.
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Why do I do anything?' she says. 'I'm educated enough to talk myself out of any plan. To deconstruct any fantasy. Explain away any goal. I'm so smart I can negate any dream.
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For the most part my friends can always be more entertaining than the tube ever can be.
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Skinny guys fight till they're burger.
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Just for the record, she still loves you. She wouldn't bother to torture you if she didn't.
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Narrator: You had to give it to him: he had a plan. And it started to make sense, in a Tyler sort of way. No fear. No distractions. The ability to let that which does not matter truly slide.
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You turn up your music to hide the noise. Other people turn up their music to hide yours. You turn up yours again. Everyone buys a bigger stereo system. This is the arms race of sound. You don't win with a lot of treble.
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I am Joe's Enraged, Inflamed, sense of rejection.
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I have to have everything in my life completely fixed and perfect and cleaned up and I have to be complete with everyone in my life and I have seven days in which to do that. So I might make it to day three or four, but I've never made it all the way to day seven.
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The most boring scenes are the scenes where a character is alone.
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Since we do operate in a binary world, if there's something that cannot be this or that, it drives us crazy.
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