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The joke is, we all have the same punchline.

Chuck Palahniuk

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Chuck Palahniuk
Age: 62
Born: 1962
Born: February 21
Essayist
Journalist
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Pasco
Washington
Charles Michael Chuck Palahniuk
Joke
Jokes

More quotes by Chuck Palahniuk

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About my boss, Tyler tells me, if I'm really angry, I should go to the post office and fill out a change-of-address card and have all his mail forwarded to Rugby, North Dakota.
Chuck Palahniuk
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Schools of science and physics replacing each other at a faster and faster rate. Just the nature of our world is constant revision, constant...negation of previous beliefs, and so...the whole world is a twist ending. Every week is a twist ending.
Chuck Palahniuk
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I've been choking to death for years. By now this should be easy.
Chuck Palahniuk
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I don't remember the hotel rooms or the airports but I always remember the events.
Chuck Palahniuk
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I'm never going to have to work. None of my descendants are ever going to have to work this is going to make me so much money. It was such a letdown when I realized that wasn't my invention.
Chuck Palahniuk
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I write because it's a way of presenting something without having to be there.
Chuck Palahniuk
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Every day: Wear sunblock. Cover your gray. Do not go insane. Eat less fats and sugars. Do more sit-ups. Don’t start forgetting stuff. Trim the hair in your ears. Take calcium. Moisturize. Every day. Freeze in time to stay in one place forever. Do not get frigging old.
Chuck Palahniuk
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The old rule about how a thing of beauty is a joy forever, in my experience, even the most beauteous thing is only a joy for about three hours, tops. After that, she'll want to tell you all about her childhood traumas. Part of meeting these jail girls is it's so sweet to look at your watch and know she'll be behind bars in half an hour.
Chuck Palahniuk
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Someday you will die, and until you know that, you're useless to me.
Chuck Palahniuk
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If you haven't already noticed, all my books are about a lonely person looking for some way to connect with other people.In a way, that is the opposite of the American Dream: to get so rich you can rise above the rabble, all those people on the freeway or, worse, the bus.
Chuck Palahniuk
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Yes, these are bruises from fighting and I'm okay with that.
Chuck Palahniuk
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Her mom and dad are both doctors and want her to follow her dream, not turn out the way they have, no matter how much it costs them.
Chuck Palahniuk
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I try to forget about the expectation that's out there and the audience listening for the next thing so that I'm not trying to please them. I've spent a huge amount of time not communicating with those folks and denying that they exist.
Chuck Palahniuk
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The only reason why we ask other people how their weekend was is so we can tell them about our own weekend.
Chuck Palahniuk
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Do you remember when you were 10 or 11 years old and you really thought your folks were the best? They were completely omniscient and you took their word for everything. And then you got older and you went through this hideous age when suddenly they were the devil, they were bullies, and they didn't know anything.
Chuck Palahniuk
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Minimalism seems closest to the sophisticated storytelling of movies. Movies have really educated contemporary audiences to be the most intelligent, sophisticated audiences in history. We don't any longer need to have the relationship between one scene and the next explained. We will figure it out ourselves.
Chuck Palahniuk
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Taste is such a changing thing. Every age our tastes change. But the things that really last aren't necessarily the best or the worst or the most loved things, but they're the things that make the biggest impression.
Chuck Palahniuk
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Maybe self-improvement isn't the answer, maybe self-destruction is the answer.
Chuck Palahniuk
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If emotion can create a physical action, then duplicating the physical action can re-create the emotion.
Chuck Palahniuk
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It's all mirror, mirror on the wall because beauty is power the same way money is power the same way a gun is power.
Chuck Palahniuk