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Self improvement is masturbation.
Chuck Palahniuk
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Chuck Palahniuk
Age: 62
Born: 1962
Born: February 21
Essayist
Journalist
Novelist
Science Fiction Writer
Screenwriter
Writer
Pasco
Washington
Charles Michael Chuck Palahniuk
Cynical
Improvement
Development
Self
Betterment
Masturbation
Improving
More quotes by Chuck Palahniuk
Telling some stories, Miss Leroy says, is committing suicide.
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I want my whole life lined with a topical anesthetic.
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Since we do operate in a binary world, if there's something that cannot be this or that, it drives us crazy.
Chuck Palahniuk
Stone crumbles. Wood rots. People, well they die. But things as fragile as a thought, a dream, a legend, they can go on and on.
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Some people still think knowledge is power.
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We'll never be as young as we are tonight.
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Our real discoveries come from chaos, from going to the place that looks wrong and stupid and foolish.
Chuck Palahniuk
You ever wonder when God's coming back with a lot of barbecue sauce?
Chuck Palahniuk
What I mean is sometimes, for an artist, chronic pain can be a gift.
Chuck Palahniuk
Because nothing is as perfect as you can imagine it.
Chuck Palahniuk
I will never write a sequel to anything that I will ever write.
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Burn the Louvre, and wipe your ass with the Mona Lisa. This way at least, God would know our names.
Chuck Palahniuk
We went sailing one time, and he wore a Speedo, and any smart woman should know that means bisexual at least.
Chuck Palahniuk
You know how both life and porno movies end. The only difference is life starts with the orgasm.
Chuck Palahniuk
Schools of science and physics replacing each other at a faster and faster rate. Just the nature of our world is constant revision, constant...negation of previous beliefs, and so...the whole world is a twist ending. Every week is a twist ending.
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That if you could acquire enough, accomplish enough, you’d never want to own or do another thing. That if you could eat or sleep enough, you’d never need more. That if enough people loved you, you’d stop needing love.
Chuck Palahniuk
You can't be beautiful, Brandy says about a thousand times, until you feel beautiful.
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You humiliate a rich person and they're still rich. You humiliate a brilliant person and they're still smart. A person who is well connected is still the king of England. But if you humiliate a young person, you take away the only form of power they have.
Chuck Palahniuk
So here I am. This is as good as it gets. Take it or leave it.
Chuck Palahniuk
We have pain and hate and love and joy and war in the world because we want them.
Chuck Palahniuk