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If you can't swim, the idea of being in nine feet of water is terrifying, much less the ocean.
Chuck Klosterman
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Chuck Klosterman
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: June 5
Author
Journalist
Music Critic
Breckenridge
Minnesota
Charles John Klosterman
Less
Water
Idea
Ideas
Terrifying
Much
Swim
Nine
Ocean
Feet
More quotes by Chuck Klosterman
Gay marriage should be legalized in america because gay men are the only men who want to be married.
Chuck Klosterman
I tend to equate sadness with intelligence.
Chuck Klosterman
First, you must love yourself. And if you do that convincingly enough, others will love you too much.
Chuck Klosterman
As an adult, the only people who care about horror movies are academics. No one loves to talk about horror films more than somebody with a Ph.D. in cultural studies at a university.
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I really hate being sick. It seems inevitable that at one point, one of these predicted epidemics is going to be real. So often they come up, and there's people like me that are freaked out, and the majority of people are just like, You're being idiots, this happens every other year.
Chuck Klosterman
To me, every interview, even if you love the artist, needs to be somewhat adversarial. Which doesn't mean you need to attack the person, but you do need to look at it like you're trying to get information that has not been written about before.
Chuck Klosterman
We’re all tourists, sort of. Life is tourism, sort of. As far as I’m concerned, the dinosaurs still hold the lease on this godforsaken rock.
Chuck Klosterman
I almost never get lonely. I love being alone. I'm glad I'm married, and I love my wife. But there's never been a situation in my life where my unhappiness was based on loneliness.
Chuck Klosterman
I hate the point where you have to get off the ladder, or get back on. I don't know if that's a fear of heights, or literally a fear of falling. I want to be afraid to fall. That seems like a good fear.
Chuck Klosterman
Real people are actively trying to live like fake people, so real people are no less fake. Every comparison becomes impractical. This is why the impractical has become totally acceptable impracticality almost seems cool.
Chuck Klosterman
The amount of response I get, in both a negative and a positive context, is completely related to the amount of books I sell, I think. It seems to have nothing to do with what I'm writing, but what degree of success I'm perceived to have.
Chuck Klosterman
At a magazine, everything you do is edited by a bunch of people, by committee, and a lot of them are, were, or think of themselves as writers. Part of that is because magazines worry about their voice.
Chuck Klosterman
Every relationship is fundamentally a power struggle, and the individual in power is whoever likes the other person less.
Chuck Klosterman
If rain is God crying, I think God is drunk and his girlfriend just slept with Zeus.
Chuck Klosterman
We are often wrong about the past, but at least with the past you can change your thinking. We can't do that with the future.
Chuck Klosterman
I think this is the kind of thing where we're rapidly moving toward an age where most of the populace will be almost unable to imagine life without an Internet component interlocked with it.
Chuck Klosterman
Whenever I can’t sleep, I like to lie in the darkness and pretend I’ve been assassinated. I’ve found this is the best way to get comfortable. I imagine I’m in the coffin at my funeral, and people from my past are walking by my corpse and making comments about my demise.
Chuck Klosterman
People who are wrong during particularly important moments inevitably spend the rest of their lives trying to explain how their wrongness was paradoxically correct, or-at the very least-why their wrongness felt right at the time, which is very, very different from being authentically correct.
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Women intrinsically understand human dynamics, and that makes them unstoppable. Unfortunately, the average man is less adroit at fostering such rivalries, which is why most men remain average males are better at hating things that can't hate them back (e.g., lawnmowers, cats, the Denver Broncos, et cetera). They don't see the big picture.
Chuck Klosterman
I am ready to be alone.
Chuck Klosterman