Quote

If someone breaks your heart, just punch them in the face. Oh sure, it seems obvious now, but you'd be amazed at how many people don't think of it when it's relevant. Seriously, punch them in the face and go get some ice cream.

Chuck Klosterman

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Chuck Klosterman
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: June 5
Author
Journalist
Music Critic
Breckenridge
Minnesota
Charles John Klosterman
People
Face
Breaks
Faces
Cream
Someone
Ice
Seems
Relevant
Many
Seriously
Heart
Obvious
Think
Break
Punch
Thinking
Sure
Amazed

More quotes by Chuck Klosterman

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...I've spent the last fifteen years of my life railing against the game of soccer, an exercise that has been lauded as the sport of the future since 1977. Thankfully, that future dystopia has never come.
Chuck Klosterman
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What my mom failed to understand was that I didn't even want long hair -- I needed long hair. And my desire for protracted, flowing locks had virtually nothing to do with fashion, nor was it a form of protest against the constructions of mainstream society. My motivation was far more philosophical. I wanted to rock.
Chuck Klosterman
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The most wretched people in the world are those who tell you they like every kind of music 'except country.' People who say that are boorish and pretentious at the same time.
Chuck Klosterman
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It's peculiar what you remember when you're not trying.
Chuck Klosterman
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I tend to equate sadness with intelligence.
Chuck Klosterman
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I don't go to scary movies. I don't like the experience of being scared. I think it's very weird that some people do. Obviously, humans are the only animals that do that. You don't see a wolf walk to the end of a cliff and look over the edge to freak himself out.
Chuck Klosterman
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I grew up on a farm, and we didn't have cable and only limited radio stations, so I wasn't inundated with culture the way people in other parts of the country were. But I was really interested in it.
Chuck Klosterman
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If you stare long enough at anything, you will start to find similarities. The word “coincidence” exists in order to stop people from seeing meaning where none exists.
Chuck Klosterman
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It might sound chauvinistic, but there is a sad reality in rock music: Bands who depend on support from females inevitably crash and burn.
Chuck Klosterman
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I think anyone who's not as good a writer as me is absolutely a hack, and I think anybody who's a slightly better writer than me is brilliant. So of course that makes me a horrible critic when it comes to books, because I can't distance my own experience from what I'm doing.
Chuck Klosterman
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When I'm walking around, I'm usually drinking pop, so I can't have a mask on. That's why I couldn't be a surgeon.
Chuck Klosterman
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Every relationship is fundamentally a power struggle, and the individual in power is whoever likes the other person less.
Chuck Klosterman
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It doesn't matter what you can do if you don't know why you're doing it.
Chuck Klosterman
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When I think about the future, I'm not necessarily arguing it's going to be better or worse. I'm just saying it's going to be different.
Chuck Klosterman
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Necessity used to be the mother of invention, but then we ran out of things that were necessary. The postmodern mother of invention is desire we don’t really “need” anything new, so we only create what we want.
Chuck Klosterman
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Every time I learn the truth about something, I’m disappointed
Chuck Klosterman
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I am of the opinion, and have been for a long time, that any kind of big technological move is almost always positive in the short term but inevitably somewhat negative in the long term. And I think there are many examples of this in every possible context.
Chuck Klosterman
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Mostly, we argued about who which of us was better at arguing, and particularly about who had won the previous argument.
Chuck Klosterman
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Technology evolves faster than people do, faster than biology does.
Chuck Klosterman
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Why don't I like crowds? I suppose the worst possible thing I could say is that I don't like people, and that crowds are just collections of people. That seems like a very nihilistic way to look at the world.
Chuck Klosterman