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Sarcasm is when you tell someone the truth by lying on purpose.

Chuck Klosterman

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Chuck Klosterman
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: June 5
Author
Journalist
Music Critic
Breckenridge
Minnesota
Charles John Klosterman
Truth
Sarcasm
Lying
Purpose
Tell
Someone

More quotes by Chuck Klosterman

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The worst thing you can do to anybody trying to be creative is to demand participation in their vision.
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Football allows the intellectual part of my brain to evolve, but it allows the emotional part to remain unchanged. It has a liberal cerebellum and a reactionary heart. And this is all I want from everything, all the time, always.
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Soccer is like punk rock: The product is not necessarily terrible. The problem is the fan base.
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I almost never get lonely. I love being alone. I'm glad I'm married, and I love my wife. But there's never been a situation in my life where my unhappiness was based on loneliness.
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This made her remember why people take up walking: It is because they no longer have anywhere to go.
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Why don't I like crowds? I suppose the worst possible thing I could say is that I don't like people, and that crowds are just collections of people. That seems like a very nihilistic way to look at the world.
Chuck Klosterman
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Book writing is a little different because, in my case, my editor is a year younger than me and basically has the same sensibility as me.
Chuck Klosterman
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If I had to make a choice between only writing about sports or only writing about music, I would probably write about music. I'm not sure why that is. There seems to be more to write about with music, just because it's more of a splintered thing. There's more subgenres. With sports, it's more objective in a way.
Chuck Klosterman
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I am ready to be alone.
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I honestly believe that people of my generation despise authenticity, mostly because they're all so envious of it.
Chuck Klosterman
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First, you must love yourself. And if you do that convincingly enough, others will love you too much.
Chuck Klosterman
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If you’re the type of person who wants to associate exclusively with those who perfectly mirror your own ethical worldview, you’re reducing significantly the scope of your potential life experience.
Chuck Klosterman
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We are often wrong about the past, but at least with the past you can change your thinking. We can't do that with the future.
Chuck Klosterman
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Observing someone without context amplifies the experience. The more we know, the less we are able to feel.
Chuck Klosterman
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To me, fear of the future means fear of technology. I have a little bit of that. I still use it, but I kind of see technology as this harmful thing that's so ingrained in my life that it sort of dictates and controls my relationship with it.
Chuck Klosterman
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We assume that all statements must be mild inversions of the truth, because it's too weird to imagine people who aren't casually lying, pretty much all the time.
Chuck Klosterman
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I am of the opinion, and have been for a long time, that any kind of big technological move is almost always positive in the short term but inevitably somewhat negative in the long term. And I think there are many examples of this in every possible context.
Chuck Klosterman
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If you can't swim, the idea of being in nine feet of water is terrifying, much less the ocean.
Chuck Klosterman
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I tend to equate sadness with intelligence.
Chuck Klosterman
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I think this is the kind of thing where we're rapidly moving toward an age where most of the populace will be almost unable to imagine life without an Internet component interlocked with it.
Chuck Klosterman