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It's Christmas! Ah, Christmas, the time when all good people go about not decapitating each other.

Christopher Moore

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Christopher Moore
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: January 1
Actor
Assistant Director
Journalist
Novelist
Radio Dj
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Toledo
Ohio
Christmas
Good
Time
People

More quotes by Christopher Moore

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I fink I gots deaf on me willie.
Christopher Moore
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. . . You seem upset, Charlie. Is something wrong? Charlie: No, no, I’m okay, I just had to take directions from a mute beaver in a fez to get here, it’s unsettling.
Christopher Moore
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It turns out that one can perpetrate all manner of heinous villainy under a cloak of courtesy and good cheer. . .a man will forfeit all sensible self-interest if he finds you affable enough to share your company over a flagon of ale.
Christopher Moore
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Normally if I met a guy who was unemployed and illiterate who hadn't bathed in a couple of weeks, I'd be standing in a puddle with excitement, but I'm sort of in a bad mood tonight, so take this bag and give me the fu**ing paper before I pop your head like a zit. He said, you're a lesbian, aren't you?
Christopher Moore
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Children see magic because they look for it.
Christopher Moore
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That's the scary thing about hope, she said. If you let it go too long it turns into faith.
Christopher Moore
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Don't bruise the Foo!
Christopher Moore
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The pursuit of material gain is ultimately empty when measured against eternity.
Christopher Moore
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Which is why you chose to wear that delightful ensemble from the skank-wear collection at Hoes-n-Thangs? -Tommy
Christopher Moore
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The gourney, the big file drawers of the dead, the instruments of dissection - this sure looked like the morgues in the movies. Something had gone seriously wrong while she slept.
Christopher Moore
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Why write a song when no one can play the notes or understand the lyrics?
Christopher Moore
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I know that even now, having watched enough television, you probably won't even refer to them as lepers so as to spare their feelings. You probably call them 'parts-dropping-off challenged' or something.
Christopher Moore
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I was seven before I realized that you could eat breakfast with your pants on.
Christopher Moore
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I like a girl with a substantial bottom,' said Renoir, drawing in the air the size bottom he preferred.
Christopher Moore
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Boredom can be a lethal thing on a small island.
Christopher Moore
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The value of the work we do is the value we give to it.
Christopher Moore
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From Dickens's cockneys to Salinger's phonies, from Kerouac's beatniks to Cheech and Chong's freaks, and on to hip hop's homies, dialect has always been used as a way for generations to distinguish themselves.
Christopher Moore
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Everyone is happier if they have someone else to look down on, as well as someone to look up to, especially if they resent both.
Christopher Moore
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Regardless of its purpose, the humpback-whale song is the most complex piece of nonhuman composition on earth. Whether it's art, prayer, or booty call, the humpback song is an amazing thing to experience firsthand, and I suspect that even once the science of it is put to bed, it will remain, as long as they sing, magic.
Christopher Moore
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It's about average for us. Behavior always draws more than survey. We're the sexy ones,' Nate said with a grin. Amy snorted. 'Oh, yeah, you guys are the Mae Wests of the nerd world.' We're action nerds,' Nate said. 'Adventure nerds. Nerds of romance.
Christopher Moore