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This is the man who called the fire department when the toilet backed up, and I'm asking him for help. What was I thinking? Why am I attracted to weak men?
Christopher Moore
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Christopher Moore
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: January 1
Actor
Assistant Director
Journalist
Novelist
Radio Dj
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Toledo
Ohio
Fire
Called
Backed
Help
Toilet
Helping
Toilets
Men
Attracted
Thinking
Department
Asking
Weak
More quotes by Christopher Moore
You're trying to be tricky. What's morality? It's the difference between what's right and what you can rationalize. Must be a human thing. Exactly.
Christopher Moore
The Angel Gabriel disappeared once for sixty years and they found him on earth hiding in the body of a man named Miles Davis.
Christopher Moore
You're going to break my heart, aren't you?
Christopher Moore
Don't be ridiculous, Charlie, people love the parents who beat their kids in department stores. It's the ones who just let their kids wreak havoc that everybody hates.
Christopher Moore
This Roberto. He no like the light.
Christopher Moore
Tommy had felt alone in a crowd before, even inferior to everyone in a crowd, but now he felt, well, different. It wasn't just the clothes and the make up, it was the humanity. He wasn't part of it. Heightened senses or not, he felt like he had his nose pressed against the window, looking in. The problem was, it was the window of a donut shop.
Christopher Moore
If you think anyone is sane you just don't know enough about them.
Christopher Moore
Do we look like thrill-seekers? Wasn't it enough that we had to put up that sign reading NO HABLA ESPANOL and acknowledge the existence of thirty percent of the population, even in the negative?
Christopher Moore
Lonliness evaporated off of them like the steam off dry ice, and by morning it was just a cloud on the ceiling of the room, then gone with the light.
Christopher Moore
He wanted her to experience all the glorious cheese of life.
Christopher Moore
I wanted a trumpet concerto that reflected Native American music because, well, there aren't any. I looked around for one but couldn't find anything. So it's a wide-open field.
Christopher Moore
I've seen more intelligence in the crotch lice of harem whores.
Christopher Moore
And an inky-colored despair of rejection enveloped me like the black tortilla of depression around a pain burrito.
Christopher Moore
One of them hissed-not the hiss of a cat, a long, steady tone-more like the hiss of air escaping the rubber raft that is all that lies between you and a dark sea full of sharks, the hiss of your life leaking out at the seams.
Christopher Moore
Ack! Parables. I hate parables.
Christopher Moore
The value of the work we do is the value we give to it.
Christopher Moore
What this movie needs is more brain eating zombies.
Christopher Moore
Only cops and vampires have to have an invitation to enter.
Christopher Moore
The bat was looking at Theo and Theo was having trouble following his own thoughts.The bat was wearing tiny sunglasses.Ray Bans,Theo could see by the trademark in the corner of one lens.I'm sorry, Mr.,uh- Case, could you take the bat off your head.It's very distracting. Him. Pardon? It's a him.Roberto.He no like the light.
Christopher Moore
The medium obscured the message.
Christopher Moore
