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She's evil. Evil, evil, evil. I want to see her naked.
Christopher Moore
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Christopher Moore
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: January 1
Actor
Assistant Director
Journalist
Novelist
Radio Dj
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Toledo
Ohio
Naked
Evil
More quotes by Christopher Moore
I can be most colorful and inventive when I am angry.
Christopher Moore
He always had a problem with the purity of others. Never his own.
Christopher Moore
The value of the work we do is the value we give to it.
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People, generally, suck.
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They want to be tied up, I tie them up. They want to be spanked, I spank them. They want to be called names, I call them names. But try and drink a little of their blood, and they scream like babies. What about my needs?
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When I teach seminars, I tell people, Your stuff has to look like something thats out there, because otherwise nobody will take a chance on you.
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That's a horrible plan. Yes, but I have chosen to ignore that.
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Shoes off in the whale! And don't try and make a break for the anus.
Christopher Moore
The Angel Gabriel disappeared once for sixty years and they found him on earth hiding in the body of a man named Miles Davis.
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He had risked his freedom and his pride to buy her this, to acknowledge that part of her that everyone else seemed to want to get rid of.
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It was an eight-harlot inn, if that's how you measure an inn. (I understand that now they measure inns in stars. We are in a four-star inn right now. I don't know what the conversion from harlots to stars is.)
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The angel has confided in me that he is going to ask the Lord if he can become Spider-Man. [...] The children need heroes, he says. I think he just wants to swing from buildings in tight red jammies.
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Then someone started pounding on the door. And not a little Hey, what's up? pound. Like there was a big sale on door pounds down at the Pound Outlet. Buy one, get one free at Pounds-n-Stuff. --Being the Journal of Abby Normal
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They were told what they wanted and they believed it. They can only keep their dream alive by being with others like themselves who will mirror their illusions.
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Charlie Asher: Mrs. Ling, is that duck wearing trousers? Mrs. Ling: Could be . . . . You hear of paper-wrap chicken? This duck in pants.
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Regardless of its purpose, the humpback-whale song is the most complex piece of nonhuman composition on earth. Whether it's art, prayer, or booty call, the humpback song is an amazing thing to experience firsthand, and I suspect that even once the science of it is put to bed, it will remain, as long as they sing, magic.
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I know that even now, having watched enough television, you probably won't even refer to them as lepers so as to spare their feelings. You probably call them 'parts-dropping-off challenged' or something.
Christopher Moore
If they'd been dogs, they would have all been in the yard eating grass and trying to yak up whatever was making them feel so lousy. Not a bone gnawed, not a ball chased-all tails went unwagged. Oh, life is a fast cat, a short leash, a flea in that place where you just can't scratch.
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Like God's own chocolate, I'd lick her shadow off a hot sidewalk
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An original thought would crack your feeble skull like a thunderbolt, you craven vulture.
Christopher Moore