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Ack! Parables. I hate parables.

Christopher Moore

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Christopher Moore
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: January 1
Actor
Assistant Director
Journalist
Novelist
Radio Dj
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Toledo
Ohio
Parables
Hate

More quotes by Christopher Moore

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An original thought would crack your feeble skull like a thunderbolt, you craven vulture.
Christopher Moore
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The medium obscured the message.
Christopher Moore
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He always had a problem with the purity of others. Never his own.
Christopher Moore
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People always stay the age that they died at. My big brother died of leukemia when I was six. He was eight. Now when I think of him, he's always eight, and he's still my big brother. He never changes, and the part of me that remembers him never changes.
Christopher Moore
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And an inky-colored despair of rejection enveloped me like the black tortilla of depression around a pain burrito.
Christopher Moore
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I know that even now, having watched enough television, you probably won't even refer to them as lepers so as to spare their feelings. You probably call them 'parts-dropping-off challenged' or something.
Christopher Moore
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The pursuit of material gain is ultimately empty when measured against eternity.
Christopher Moore
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Hope is merely another face of desire.
Christopher Moore
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She's evil. Evil, evil, evil. I want to see her naked.
Christopher Moore
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... but to remain historically accurate, I would have had to leave out an important question that I felt needed to be addressed, which is, 'What if Jesus had known kung fu?
Christopher Moore
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Not unlike the toaster, I control darkness.
Christopher Moore
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Blessed are the meek, for to them we shall say attaboy.
Christopher Moore
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Do we look like thrill-seekers? Wasn't it enough that we had to put up that sign reading NO HABLA ESPANOL and acknowledge the existence of thirty percent of the population, even in the negative?
Christopher Moore
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I could stand on my head and flick the bean right there at the dinner table and my mom would be all, Honey, Christmas is family time, we should be together and make me finish in front of everyone.
Christopher Moore
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All fear comes from trying to see the future, Biff. If you know what is coming, you aren't afraid.
Christopher Moore
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Pondering is a little like considering and a little like thinking, but looser. To ponder, one must let the facts roll around the rim of the mind's roulette wheel, coming to settle in whichever slot they feed pulled to.
Christopher Moore
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...she is too beautiful, I think, to not be inherently evil.
Christopher Moore
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The gourney, the big file drawers of the dead, the instruments of dissection - this sure looked like the morgues in the movies. Something had gone seriously wrong while she slept.
Christopher Moore
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I've won Satan's lottery.
Christopher Moore
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I've seen more intelligence in the crotch lice of harem whores.
Christopher Moore