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I fear you may become a lonely man, even in the company of others.

Christopher Moore

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Christopher Moore
Age: 68
Born: 1957
Born: January 1
Actor
Assistant Director
Journalist
Novelist
Radio Dj
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Toledo
Ohio
May
Even
Men
Lonely
Company
Fear
Others
Become

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Like God's own chocolate, I'd lick her shadow off a hot sidewalk
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Christmas crept into Pine Cove like a creeping Christmas thing: dragging garland, ribbon, and sleigh bells, oozing eggnog, reeking of pine, and threatening festive doom like a cold sore under the mistletoe.
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That's a horrible plan. Yes, but I have chosen to ignore that.
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It's Christmas! Ah, Christmas, the time when all good people go about not decapitating each other.
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And an inky-colored despair of rejection enveloped me like the black tortilla of depression around a pain burrito.
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She's so obnoxious. Like a whole Saturday night drunk tank full of obnoxious packed into one little body. Detective Cavuto
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From Dickens's cockneys to Salinger's phonies, from Kerouac's beatniks to Cheech and Chong's freaks, and on to hip hop's homies, dialect has always been used as a way for generations to distinguish themselves.
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The angel has confided in me that he is going to ask the Lord if he can become Spider-Man. [...] The children need heroes, he says. I think he just wants to swing from buildings in tight red jammies.
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We know there's going to be nothing but pain, but we go back again and again.
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She's so small, yet she contains so much evil.
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All fear comes from trying to see the future, Biff. If you know what is coming, you aren't afraid.
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She knew it should bother her more, being evil and all, but after she put on a little mascara and some lipstick and poured herself another cup of blood-laced coffee, she found that she was okay with it.
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This story is not and never was meant to challenge anyone's faith however, if one's faith can be shaken by stories in a humorous novel, one may have a bit more praying to do.
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I've seen more intelligence in the crotch lice of harem whores.
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. . . You seem upset, Charlie. Is something wrong? Charlie: No, no, I’m okay, I just had to take directions from a mute beaver in a fez to get here, it’s unsettling.
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I've won Satan's lottery.
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I like a girl with a substantial bottom,' said Renoir, drawing in the air the size bottom he preferred.
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She was an alien, really - a sort of eating, pooping, tantrum machine - and he didn't understand anything about her species.
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It was an eight-harlot inn, if that's how you measure an inn. (I understand that now they measure inns in stars. We are in a four-star inn right now. I don't know what the conversion from harlots to stars is.)
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This Roberto. He no like the light.
Christopher Moore