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You were supposed to empathize with your friend's problem, but they were, after all, your friend's problems.

Christopher Moore

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Christopher Moore
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: January 1
Actor
Assistant Director
Journalist
Novelist
Radio Dj
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Toledo
Ohio
Problem
Empathize
Supposed
Friend
Problems

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The prospect of change is a many-fanged beast, my dear.
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Tommy had felt alone in a crowd before, even inferior to everyone in a crowd, but now he felt, well, different. It wasn't just the clothes and the make up, it was the humanity. He wasn't part of it. Heightened senses or not, he felt like he had his nose pressed against the window, looking in. The problem was, it was the window of a donut shop.
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He was a writer and words were his weapons.
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The gourney, the big file drawers of the dead, the instruments of dissection - this sure looked like the morgues in the movies. Something had gone seriously wrong while she slept.
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Action based on hope just felt better than the paralysis of certainty.
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The value of the work we do is the value we give to it.
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From Dickens's cockneys to Salinger's phonies, from Kerouac's beatniks to Cheech and Chong's freaks, and on to hip hop's homies, dialect has always been used as a way for generations to distinguish themselves.
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Why write a song when no one can play the notes or understand the lyrics?
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I was seven before I realized that you could eat breakfast with your pants on.
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Ack! Parables. I hate parables.
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The Angel Gabriel disappeared once for sixty years and they found him on earth hiding in the body of a man named Miles Davis.
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I like a girl with a substantial bottom,' said Renoir, drawing in the air the size bottom he preferred.
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Confucius is like the Torah, rules to follow. And Lao-Tzu is even more conservative, saying that if you do nothing you won't break any rules. You have to let tradition fall sometime, you have to take action, you have to eat bacon.
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Like God's own chocolate, I'd lick her shadow off a hot sidewalk
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I fink I gots deaf on me willie.
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That's a horrible plan. Yes, but I have chosen to ignore that.
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Charlie Asher: Mrs. Ling, is that duck wearing trousers? Mrs. Ling: Could be . . . . You hear of paper-wrap chicken? This duck in pants.
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I know that even now, having watched enough television, you probably won't even refer to them as lepers so as to spare their feelings. You probably call them 'parts-dropping-off challenged' or something.
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It was an eight-harlot inn, if that's how you measure an inn. (I understand that now they measure inns in stars. We are in a four-star inn right now. I don't know what the conversion from harlots to stars is.)
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Life is loneliness, broken only by the gods taunting us with friendship and the odd bonk
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