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Everyone is happier if they have someone else to look down on, as well as someone to look up to, especially if they resent both.

Christopher Moore

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Christopher Moore
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: January 1
Actor
Assistant Director
Journalist
Novelist
Radio Dj
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Toledo
Ohio
Else
Someone
Look
Wells
Well
Resent
Looks
Happier
Especially
Everyone

More quotes by Christopher Moore

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I wanted a trumpet concerto that reflected Native American music because, well, there aren't any. I looked around for one but couldn't find anything. So it's a wide-open field.
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Well they're pissed off and they're hungry. I was kind of busy trying not to get my brains eaten. They seemed pretty adamant about the brain-eating thing. Then they're going to IKEA, I guess
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People always stay the age that they died at. My big brother died of leukemia when I was six. He was eight. Now when I think of him, he's always eight, and he's still my big brother. He never changes, and the part of me that remembers him never changes.
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Confucius is like the Torah, rules to follow. And Lao-Tzu is even more conservative, saying that if you do nothing you won't break any rules. You have to let tradition fall sometime, you have to take action, you have to eat bacon.
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Don't bruise the Foo!
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All fear comes from trying to see the future, Biff. If you know what is coming, you aren't afraid.
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The Angel Gabriel disappeared once for sixty years and they found him on earth hiding in the body of a man named Miles Davis.
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Children see magic because they look for it.
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She's so obnoxious. Like a whole Saturday night drunk tank full of obnoxious packed into one little body. Detective Cavuto
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Pondering is a little like considering and a little like thinking, but looser. To ponder, one must let the facts roll around the rim of the mind's roulette wheel, coming to settle in whichever slot they feed pulled to.
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She was an alien, really - a sort of eating, pooping, tantrum machine - and he didn't understand anything about her species.
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What this movie needs is more brain eating zombies.
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And an inky-colored despair of rejection enveloped me like the black tortilla of depression around a pain burrito.
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Lonliness evaporated off of them like the steam off dry ice, and by morning it was just a cloud on the ceiling of the room, then gone with the light.
Christopher Moore
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. . . You seem upset, Charlie. Is something wrong? Charlie: No, no, I’m okay, I just had to take directions from a mute beaver in a fez to get here, it’s unsettling.
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The netherworld is timeless and unchanging, and boring -- much like a doctor's waiting room.
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I can be most colorful and inventive when I am angry.
Christopher Moore
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Stephenie Meyer: Her vampires are sparkly, which I think we can all agree is wrong.
Christopher Moore
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Normally if I met a guy who was unemployed and illiterate who hadn't bathed in a couple of weeks, I'd be standing in a puddle with excitement, but I'm sort of in a bad mood tonight, so take this bag and give me the fu**ing paper before I pop your head like a zit. He said, you're a lesbian, aren't you?
Christopher Moore
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The angel has confided in me that he is going to ask the Lord if he can become Spider-Man. [...] The children need heroes, he says. I think he just wants to swing from buildings in tight red jammies.
Christopher Moore