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Last time I really got to know myself it turned out there was a whole gang of bitches in there to deal with. I felt like the receptionist at a rehab center. They all had nice tits though, I gotta say.
Christopher Moore
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Christopher Moore
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: January 1
Actor
Assistant Director
Journalist
Novelist
Radio Dj
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Toledo
Ohio
Rehab
Though
Gang
Lasts
Gotta
Last
Center
Felt
Turned
Receptionist
Whole
Deal
Bitches
Really
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Nice
More quotes by Christopher Moore
The pursuit of material gain is ultimately empty when measured against eternity.
Christopher Moore
That's a horrible plan. Yes, but I have chosen to ignore that.
Christopher Moore
It's about average for us. Behavior always draws more than survey. We're the sexy ones,' Nate said with a grin. Amy snorted. 'Oh, yeah, you guys are the Mae Wests of the nerd world.' We're action nerds,' Nate said. 'Adventure nerds. Nerds of romance.
Christopher Moore
I've seen more intelligence in the crotch lice of harem whores.
Christopher Moore
He wanted her to experience all the glorious cheese of life.
Christopher Moore
This is the man who called the fire department when the toilet backed up, and I'm asking him for help. What was I thinking? Why am I attracted to weak men?
Christopher Moore
The medium obscured the message.
Christopher Moore
Which is why you chose to wear that delightful ensemble from the skank-wear collection at Hoes-n-Thangs? -Tommy
Christopher Moore
What this movie needs is more brain eating zombies.
Christopher Moore
You're trying to be tricky. What's morality? It's the difference between what's right and what you can rationalize. Must be a human thing. Exactly.
Christopher Moore
Love needs room to grow. Like a rose. Or a tumor.
Christopher Moore
They want to be tied up, I tie them up. They want to be spanked, I spank them. They want to be called names, I call them names. But try and drink a little of their blood, and they scream like babies. What about my needs?
Christopher Moore
Charlie Asher: Mrs. Ling, is that duck wearing trousers? Mrs. Ling: Could be . . . . You hear of paper-wrap chicken? This duck in pants.
Christopher Moore
If you think anyone is sane you just don't know enough about them.
Christopher Moore
Tommy had felt alone in a crowd before, even inferior to everyone in a crowd, but now he felt, well, different. It wasn't just the clothes and the make up, it was the humanity. He wasn't part of it. Heightened senses or not, he felt like he had his nose pressed against the window, looking in. The problem was, it was the window of a donut shop.
Christopher Moore
Don't bruise the Foo!
Christopher Moore
I like a girl with a substantial bottom,' said Renoir, drawing in the air the size bottom he preferred.
Christopher Moore
Marry for love, stay married, and raise happy children who are quick to laugh and slow to judge.
Christopher Moore
Everyone is happier if they have someone else to look down on, as well as someone to look up to, especially if they resent both.
Christopher Moore
Compliment but do not covet.
Christopher Moore
