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I've seen more intelligence in the crotch lice of harem whores.

Christopher Moore

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Christopher Moore
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: January 1
Actor
Assistant Director
Journalist
Novelist
Radio Dj
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Toledo
Ohio
Crotch
Harem
Lice
Whores
Intelligence
Seen

More quotes by Christopher Moore

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You were supposed to empathize with your friend's problem, but they were, after all, your friend's problems.
Christopher Moore
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You're trying to be tricky. What's morality? It's the difference between what's right and what you can rationalize. Must be a human thing. Exactly.
Christopher Moore
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That's a horrible plan. Yes, but I have chosen to ignore that.
Christopher Moore
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The gourney, the big file drawers of the dead, the instruments of dissection - this sure looked like the morgues in the movies. Something had gone seriously wrong while she slept.
Christopher Moore
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This Roberto. He no like the light.
Christopher Moore
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Why write a song when no one can play the notes or understand the lyrics?
Christopher Moore
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I could stand on my head and flick the bean right there at the dinner table and my mom would be all, Honey, Christmas is family time, we should be together and make me finish in front of everyone.
Christopher Moore
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This story is not and never was meant to challenge anyone's faith however, if one's faith can be shaken by stories in a humorous novel, one may have a bit more praying to do.
Christopher Moore
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Hope is merely another face of desire.
Christopher Moore
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Marry for love, stay married, and raise happy children who are quick to laugh and slow to judge.
Christopher Moore
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She knew it should bother her more, being evil and all, but after she put on a little mascara and some lipstick and poured herself another cup of blood-laced coffee, she found that she was okay with it.
Christopher Moore
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I fear you may become a lonely man, even in the company of others.
Christopher Moore
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Christmas crept into Pine Cove like a creeping Christmas thing: dragging garland, ribbon, and sleigh bells, oozing eggnog, reeking of pine, and threatening festive doom like a cold sore under the mistletoe.
Christopher Moore
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I know that even now, having watched enough television, you probably won't even refer to them as lepers so as to spare their feelings. You probably call them 'parts-dropping-off challenged' or something.
Christopher Moore
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Regardless of its purpose, the humpback-whale song is the most complex piece of nonhuman composition on earth. Whether it's art, prayer, or booty call, the humpback song is an amazing thing to experience firsthand, and I suspect that even once the science of it is put to bed, it will remain, as long as they sing, magic.
Christopher Moore
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It's Christmas! Ah, Christmas, the time when all good people go about not decapitating each other.
Christopher Moore
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. . . You seem upset, Charlie. Is something wrong? Charlie: No, no, I’m okay, I just had to take directions from a mute beaver in a fez to get here, it’s unsettling.
Christopher Moore
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Diogenes carried a bowl with him for years, but one day saw a man drinking from his cupped palm and declared, ‘I have been a fool, burdened all these years by the weight of a bowl when a perfectly good vessel lay at the end of my wrist.
Christopher Moore
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People always stay the age that they died at. My big brother died of leukemia when I was six. He was eight. Now when I think of him, he's always eight, and he's still my big brother. He never changes, and the part of me that remembers him never changes.
Christopher Moore
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Routine feeds the illusion of safety.
Christopher Moore