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I've won Satan's lottery.

Christopher Moore

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Christopher Moore
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: January 1
Actor
Assistant Director
Journalist
Novelist
Radio Dj
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Toledo
Ohio
Lottery
Satan

More quotes by Christopher Moore

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He always had a problem with the purity of others. Never his own.
Christopher Moore
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Abby: I could be a slave to your darkest desires. I can do things. Anything you want. Tommy: Well, that's terrific, because we have a lot of laundry piled up and the apartment is a wreck. Abby: Anything you desire, my lord. I can do laundry, clean, bring you small creatures to quench your thirst until I am worthy.
Christopher Moore
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Children see magic because they look for it.
Christopher Moore
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I know that even now, having watched enough television, you probably won't even refer to them as lepers so as to spare their feelings. You probably call them 'parts-dropping-off challenged' or something.
Christopher Moore
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Which is why you chose to wear that delightful ensemble from the skank-wear collection at Hoes-n-Thangs? -Tommy
Christopher Moore
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Boredom can be a lethal thing on a small island.
Christopher Moore
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I am convinced by the events of the last few weeks that nefarious forces of people--unidentified but no less real--are threatening life as we know it, and in fact, may be bent on unraveling the very fabric of our existence.
Christopher Moore
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When I teach seminars, I tell people, Your stuff has to look like something thats out there, because otherwise nobody will take a chance on you.
Christopher Moore
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I've seen more intelligence in the crotch lice of harem whores.
Christopher Moore
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I can be most colorful and inventive when I am angry.
Christopher Moore
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This Roberto. He no like the light.
Christopher Moore
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An original thought would crack your feeble skull like a thunderbolt, you craven vulture.
Christopher Moore
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It's Christmas! Ah, Christmas, the time when all good people go about not decapitating each other.
Christopher Moore
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Nothing evokes the prurient like puritanism.
Christopher Moore
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...she is too beautiful, I think, to not be inherently evil.
Christopher Moore
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He invented Kung Fu when translated to English means method by which short, bald guys can kick the bejeezus out of you.
Christopher Moore
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The bat was looking at Theo and Theo was having trouble following his own thoughts.The bat was wearing tiny sunglasses.Ray Bans,Theo could see by the trademark in the corner of one lens.I'm sorry, Mr.,uh- Case, could you take the bat off your head.It's very distracting. Him. Pardon? It's a him.Roberto.He no like the light.
Christopher Moore
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The medium obscured the message.
Christopher Moore
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For me, 'Lamb' started out as a further exploration of the phenomenon of faith and the responsibility of a messiah that I touched on in 'Coyote Blue' and 'Island of the Sequined Love Nun,' but it ended up being an exploration of the true meaning of sacrifice, loyalty, and friendship.
Christopher Moore
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Enchantment and seduction were fine means of persuasion, but when time is short, an awkward but quick concussion could better serve a girl's purpose.
Christopher Moore