Quote

Christmas crept into Pine Cove like a creeping Christmas thing: dragging garland, ribbon, and sleigh bells, oozing eggnog, reeking of pine, and threatening festive doom like a cold sore under the mistletoe.

Christopher Moore

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Christopher Moore
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: January 1
Actor
Assistant Director
Journalist
Novelist
Radio Dj
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Toledo
Ohio
Bells
Garlands
Sleigh
Christmas
Creeping
Sleighs
Cold
Dragging
Oozing
Thing
Sore
Mistletoe
Like
Ribbons
Garland
Pine
Ribbon
Doom
Crept
Reeking
Threatening
Festive
Cove

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The medium obscured the message.
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The problem with being nuts, she thought, is that you don't always feel as if you're nuts. Sometimes, in fact, you feel perfectly sane, and there just happens to be a trailer-shaped dragon crouching in the lot next door.
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Abby: I could be a slave to your darkest desires. I can do things. Anything you want. Tommy: Well, that's terrific, because we have a lot of laundry piled up and the apartment is a wreck. Abby: Anything you desire, my lord. I can do laundry, clean, bring you small creatures to quench your thirst until I am worthy.
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Love needs room to grow. Like a rose. Or a tumor.
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I am convinced by the events of the last few weeks that nefarious forces of people--unidentified but no less real--are threatening life as we know it, and in fact, may be bent on unraveling the very fabric of our existence.
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Compliment but do not covet.
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It turns out that one can perpetrate all manner of heinous villainy under a cloak of courtesy and good cheer. . .a man will forfeit all sensible self-interest if he finds you affable enough to share your company over a flagon of ale.
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Last time I really got to know myself it turned out there was a whole gang of bitches in there to deal with. I felt like the receptionist at a rehab center. They all had nice tits though, I gotta say.
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Nothing evokes the prurient like puritanism.
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If you think anyone is sane you just don't know enough about them.
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An original thought would crack your feeble skull like a thunderbolt, you craven vulture.
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Life is loneliness, broken only by the gods taunting us with friendship and the odd bonk
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It was sometimes difficult to reconcile a man's talents with his personality.
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We know there's going to be nothing but pain, but we go back again and again.
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It's about average for us. Behavior always draws more than survey. We're the sexy ones,' Nate said with a grin. Amy snorted. 'Oh, yeah, you guys are the Mae Wests of the nerd world.' We're action nerds,' Nate said. 'Adventure nerds. Nerds of romance.
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She was an alien, really - a sort of eating, pooping, tantrum machine - and he didn't understand anything about her species.
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She knew it should bother her more, being evil and all, but after she put on a little mascara and some lipstick and poured herself another cup of blood-laced coffee, she found that she was okay with it.
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Stephenie Meyer: Her vampires are sparkly, which I think we can all agree is wrong.
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Don't be ridiculous, Charlie, people love the parents who beat their kids in department stores. It's the ones who just let their kids wreak havoc that everybody hates.
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Boredom can be a lethal thing on a small island.
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