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People, generally, suck.

Christopher Moore

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Christopher Moore
Age: 67
Born: 1957
Born: January 1
Actor
Assistant Director
Journalist
Novelist
Radio Dj
Science Fiction Writer
Writer
Toledo
Ohio
Suck
Generally
People

More quotes by Christopher Moore

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I fink I gots deaf on me willie.
Christopher Moore
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When I teach seminars, I tell people, Your stuff has to look like something thats out there, because otherwise nobody will take a chance on you.
Christopher Moore
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Do we look like thrill-seekers? Wasn't it enough that we had to put up that sign reading NO HABLA ESPANOL and acknowledge the existence of thirty percent of the population, even in the negative?
Christopher Moore
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The gourney, the big file drawers of the dead, the instruments of dissection - this sure looked like the morgues in the movies. Something had gone seriously wrong while she slept.
Christopher Moore
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So Now You're Death: Here's What You'll Need
Christopher Moore
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You're going to break my heart, aren't you?
Christopher Moore
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I was seven before I realized that you could eat breakfast with your pants on.
Christopher Moore
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That's a horrible plan. Yes, but I have chosen to ignore that.
Christopher Moore
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An original thought would crack your feeble skull like a thunderbolt, you craven vulture.
Christopher Moore
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I could stand on my head and flick the bean right there at the dinner table and my mom would be all, Honey, Christmas is family time, we should be together and make me finish in front of everyone.
Christopher Moore
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Nothing evokes the prurient like puritanism.
Christopher Moore
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Diogenes carried a bowl with him for years, but one day saw a man drinking from his cupped palm and declared, ‘I have been a fool, burdened all these years by the weight of a bowl when a perfectly good vessel lay at the end of my wrist.
Christopher Moore
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If they'd been dogs, they would have all been in the yard eating grass and trying to yak up whatever was making them feel so lousy. Not a bone gnawed, not a ball chased-all tails went unwagged. Oh, life is a fast cat, a short leash, a flea in that place where you just can't scratch.
Christopher Moore
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Everyone is happier if they have someone else to look down on, as well as someone to look up to, especially if they resent both.
Christopher Moore
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It turns out that one can perpetrate all manner of heinous villainy under a cloak of courtesy and good cheer. . .a man will forfeit all sensible self-interest if he finds you affable enough to share your company over a flagon of ale.
Christopher Moore
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For me, 'Lamb' started out as a further exploration of the phenomenon of faith and the responsibility of a messiah that I touched on in 'Coyote Blue' and 'Island of the Sequined Love Nun,' but it ended up being an exploration of the true meaning of sacrifice, loyalty, and friendship.
Christopher Moore
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The angel has confided in me that he is going to ask the Lord if he can become Spider-Man. [...] The children need heroes, he says. I think he just wants to swing from buildings in tight red jammies.
Christopher Moore
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Charlie Asher: Mrs. Ling, is that duck wearing trousers? Mrs. Ling: Could be . . . . You hear of paper-wrap chicken? This duck in pants.
Christopher Moore
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The problem with being nuts, she thought, is that you don't always feel as if you're nuts. Sometimes, in fact, you feel perfectly sane, and there just happens to be a trailer-shaped dragon crouching in the lot next door.
Christopher Moore
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This is the man who called the fire department when the toilet backed up, and I'm asking him for help. What was I thinking? Why am I attracted to weak men?
Christopher Moore