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It's weird with stand-up comedy. It doesn't really translate worldwide. I want to figure out how do I make it worldwide. Do a special in Africa. Can't beat that. Pull that off, then I will have done something.

Chris Rock

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Chris Rock
Age: 59
Born: 1965
Born: February 7
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Television Producer
Andrews
South Carolina
Cris Rock
Christopher Julius Rock III
Lil penny
Christopher Rock
Special
Pull
Doesn
Beat
Done
Weird
Something
Beats
Really
Figure
Make
Figures
Worldwide
Comedy
Translate
Stand
Africa

More quotes by Chris Rock

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Welcome to the 77th and last Oscars.
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Only married people understand you can be miserable and happy at the same time.
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Whoever you hate will end up in your family. You don't like gays? You're gonna have a gay son. You don't like Puerto Ricans? Your daughter's gonna come home with Livin' La Vida Loca!
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I'm pretty good at getting over people throwing stuff at me. If you've been doing stand up long enough you know how to swing back and get the laughs.
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I know what you're thinking: why is Chris Rock bagging groceries? But I dropped out of high school in the tenth grade, so if I couldn't tell jokes this is exactly what I'd be doing.
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If you're the president you only have two jobs: peace and money.
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Comedy is a group activity, a verbal orgy.
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I just remember that whenever I got really mad or passionate, like in an argument, people would laugh, and I'd be dead serious. It would happen a lot. So it was like, Gee, I've got something here.
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I was at Michael Jackson's house, and this kid runs out, 'Wait, save me!'
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Every comedian has a moment in his life when he realizes he's a little bit different from everyone else. It's like being the only guy in a movie who sees the ghost. The ghost talks to you and you talk to him. Then you turn to your friend and say, Hey. Do you see that ghost? And he says, What ghost?
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You can never make a woman happy, it's impossible. I've never met a happy woman in my life. They're always complaining about something.
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Kids always act up the most before they go to sleep.
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A comedy club is a place where you work out material, you're trying material.
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Men are handicapped when it comes to arguing, 'cause we have a need to make sense.
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Tomorrow is more sure than just about anything else in the entire world.
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You cannot win in a fight against women, cause men have a need to make sense
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If poor people knew how rich rich people are, there would be riots in the streets.
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So, to say Barack Obama is progress is saying that he's the first black person that is qualified to be president. That's not black progress. That's white progress.
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When I hear people talk about juggling or the sacrifices they make for their children, I look at them like they're crazy because sacrifice infers that there was something better to do than the thing - than being with your children.
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Kids raised on a culture of “We’re not going to keep score in the game because we don’t want anybody to lose.” Or just ignoring race to a fault. You can’t say “the black kid over there.” No, it’s “the guy with the red shoes.” You can’t even be offensive on your way to being inoffensive.
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